Yellow
by eclarefanxxx
Summary: A night under the stars ensues change for Eli Goldsworthy and Clare Edwards.
1. Chapter 1

Yellow

"Get away from me, Jake!" Clare shouted, hurriedly gathering her belongings in her room.

Jake rushed towards her, desperately trying to stop her from stepping through the door. "Clare, wait! Don't go." He pleaded, reaching for her hands.

Clare shoved him away. "Don't touch me! You _cheated_ on me!"

"It was a mistake. Jenna means nothing to me, I swear! _She_ kissed _me_!" Jake continued to block the doorway until Clare shoved him aside.

"Really? That's exactly what you told me when you and Alli kissed at the cabin. You're the reason she and I aren't friends, but I talked to her, Jake. I talked to Alli, and she said it was mutual! You're a liar. I can't be around you!" She quickly brushed past him and ran out the door and down the steps. "Oh, and if you're really so pathetic that you get high every night and hook up with hurting girls, I feel sorry for you." The local park wasn't far away, so she quickly biked there, eager to escape anything and everything.

Eli Goldsworthy's phone buzzed with a text from: Clare Edwards.

FROM: CLARE EDWARDS

Eli, I need you. Come to the park. Please.

Clare

Thirty minutes later…

"I gave him everything." Clare whispered, hating the space between her and Eli.

Eli wanted nothing more than to move closer to her, to comfort her, to do _something_. He couldn't. Too much had happened, and the distance between him and the girl he loved was far too great. He simply leaned back on the grass and stared up at the stars twinkling in the night sky. His heart broke at the thought of someone taking sick advantage of the gift of making love to Clare Edwards.

Clare had not cried yet tonight; she was too angry. She had stupidly and blindly trusted Jake, slept with him, and abandoned everyone else in her life. It wasn't until she had caught him trying to smuggle several servings of weed into his room one night that she began to wonder if she truly knew him. Given he was her stepbrother, so she shouldn't have been sleeping with him anyway. It wasn't until the day that Katie Matlin and Marisol Lewis approached Clare and told her that they had seen Jake and Jenna fooling around in the computer lab that Clare knew her premonition was true.

She turned on her side towards Eli, facing him. He was on his back, gazing up at the stars. "Why did you come, Eli?"

Never once taking his eyes off the shining stars, he answered, "You said you needed me, didn't you?"

She nodded, propping herself up with her elbow. "I didn't think you would come."

Eli didn't dare look at her. "I'll always be here if you need me, Clare. I haven't written you out of my life."

"Don't say that. I never wrote you out of my life. I didn't mean for any of this to happen." Clare whispered, wanting nothing more than to just hold his hand. She knew this could never be done, though. He had his walls up, and they most likely would never come down again.

Eli sighed frustrated, turning his head to finally look into the blue eyes that haunted his desires. They were filled with tears, and the girl they belonged to didn't deserve to be hurting inside. "Nor did I, Clare, but we can't undo the past. You left me. I suffocated you, and you left that hospital room for a reason."

"I should have stayed with you." She murmured, fixing her eyes on a slightly bent blade of green grass.

Eli gently placed a hand on hers. "I wanted you to, but if you had, I wouldn't be where I am right now. I probably never would have gotten the help I needed or come to the conclusion that what I did was wrong. I manipulated you, and I'm sorry." He quickly removed his hand, much to her dismay.

Tears leaked out of her eyes and trailed down her cheeks. "Leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever had to do." She whimpered, wishing he had left his hand in hers. "I was in love with you, Eli, _so_ in love. As soon as I walked into your hospital room and saw you all beaten up like that, a part of me just…died. I wanted to stay with you, but I just couldn't. I was scared."

"I'm trying to let you go." He replied, his throat growing thick with grief.

Clare pushed herself close to Eli, pressing herself against him completely. "What if I don't want you to?"

He grew confused at the heavenly but torturous proximity. "Wha-?"

"Let's start over, Eli. Let's stop wasting time." She tried to throw herself at him, climbing on top of him and desperately trying to reach his lips.

He pulled back and gave her a bewildered look. "Clare, we can't just start over. We have to talk things through; I can't be here for you like this right now. I don't know what to do, Clare. You're always changing your mind, confusing me, and I can't keep up. Just tell me…_why_." Eli said softly, scooting upwards so he could lean on the tree trunk.

Clare's throat tightened uncomfortably as tears filled her eyes. She began to shake, attempting to prevent the tears from falling and the sobs from escaping. However, she just couldn't. The shaking, hurt, confused girl burst into heaving sobs and tears blinded her. Suddenly, all she could feel was pressure on her lungs as loud sobs erupted from her chest.

Eli's eyes widened slightly at the usually composed girl; the only time he had ever seen her cry was when her parents were getting a divorce. He had hugged her tightly in the hallway that day, making sure she knew he didn't mind that she was crying on his shoulder. Now, however, he picked the sobbing girl up and sat her down in his lap. He didn't care that she was shaking, or that they were broken up, or that she may not want him to hold her like this. He gently pulled her head onto his shoulder and patted her curls down as he settled her into a hug. She was finally cracking. The girl who lost her virginity to her stepbrother was crying; the girl who lost her best friend was crying; the girl who just wanted a second chance at love was crying.

"Clare, it's okay. Calm down." He tried talking her down, rubbing her back and rocking her small frame back and forth, but nothing worked. Everything that had gone on in Clare's life was finally shaking her, maybe even damaging her.

"I-I-I can't c-calm down," she rasped out between frantic sobs, clinging onto him like she never wanted to let go. "I-I love you…so much, Eli, please," she was almost shrieking, being torn into pieces when she realized how wrong she had been all this time. Jake would never hold her like this is she was doing anything besides smiling. He would never stand by her, or rub her back and comfort her like Eli was doing right now. "Please, Eli, I-I need y-you," she continued to shake against him, grabbing fistfuls of his leather jacket and crying louder than she ever had in her life.

Eli hushed her and stared up at the sparkling stars. They were shining with what looked like the purest form of hope one could ever imagine. The moon was a crescent, shining down on the two. "Settle down, sweetheart." He whispered, hugging her tightly to him. "I love you, too. We just need to talk. I'm sorry if I set you off, but believe me when I say that I think we can work this out."

Clare held onto his jacket for dear life, burying her face into his neck and inhaling his scent. "Eli…I was so wrong…so wrong, so very wrong. I was a _bitch_. I miss you so much, I miss Alli, I miss my daddy. I miss my sister." She sobbed, loving the way he ran his hands up and down her back in soothing motions. "Everything fell apart before I even met you, and now that I know you, I wish you could be here forever. Everyone leaves, Eli!"

"Shh, Clare," he tried to begin, but she cut him off.

"No! Everyone leaves, Eli, because I hurt them! Things have been messed up for so long, and I made them worse! I lost Alli, I lost my sister, I lost my father. I _can'_t lose _you_ too! _Please, forgive me."_ Clare finished her short monologue before taking a gasping breath and grabbing Eli's hand. "Please, please forgive me. I want you; I need you." It took all of her energy not to throw herself at him and attack him with kisses making up for lost time.

Eli instructed her to take deep breaths, and she reciprocated his breathing examples. After about two minutes of restoring her breath, Clare finally gained some of her composure. "I'm aware that you have problems in your life, Clare, but you can only fix one at a time. I'm here, okay? Just relax and lay down." He rested his hand on her cheek, lowering her onto the grass and off his lap. He slowly leaned over her, not caring how swollen her face was from her hysterical crying. "Clare, I'm going to kiss you. I need you to stay still." With that, Eli gently kissed her lips, running his hands down her waist in a comforting manner. There was nothing sexual about this kiss; this kiss was simply a test for if the love still lingered between the two. It had been so long since Eli and Clare had kissed. Clare sighed with pleasure and just basked in the warmth of Eli's body pressed against her own. His lips moved over hers, and finally, she couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't just stay still. Something like that of a fire sprung up between the two and suddenly, Clare kissed him back fiercely, hugging him tightly to her.

**"Your skin, oh yeah your skin and bones, turn into something beautiful. D'you know for you I'd bleed myself dry. For you I'd bleed myself dry."**

**"It's true, look how they shine for you." **

** "Look at the stars, look how they shine for you, all the things that you do."**

Clare only pulled back when Eli did. They gasped and held onto each other with everything they had, reaching to regain the relationship they once had. Clare's breath was shaky and ragged as she caressed his cheek. "What do you need me to do to prove that I love you? I'll do anything. I'll make love to you." She bravely kissed his cheek and stared into his eyes, eager for answers.

"I don't need you to do that for me, especially not tonight. Let me get to know you again, Clare. The start of the school year is soon; let's start fresh, just like you said." Eli murmured, kissing her forehead tightly before bringing her nodding head back into his chest and wrapping his arms around her. "Go to sleep, Edwards. You've had a long night. I'll be here in the morning, and then I'll take you home."

The sleepy girl nodded, reaching for his hand blindly as sleep began to overtake her. Smirking, he lay them both down, keeping his arms around her, and intertwined their fingers. The last thing they both saw were the stars shining brilliantly above them.

**"Look at the stars, look how they shine for you and everything you do, yeah they were all yellow." **

Quick Note- Thank you for reading This could be a two-shot. It depends on how many people want a second chapter. Oh, and "Yellow" by Coldplay gave me inspiration to write this piece. Please review!


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2…

"Clare," Eli gently shook the sleeping girl awake as bright sunshine peeked over the park's grassy hills.

Clare's blue eyes slowly opened as she awoke with a slight groan, stretching herself out. She slowly sat up, slightly disoriented after her night of confusion. "Oh, hi." She blushed as she finally remembered being so close to Eli last night. "Listen, Eli, I'm really sorry. I-"

"It's okay. I'm glad you're okay." He sternly whispered, recalling the kiss they shared the night before.

Clare's brows furrowed in confusion. "Eli…where are we right now? Are we going to be okay? You…you stayed with me. That's more than I even deserve." She shamefully averted her eyes to the grass below her.

"Clare," Eli gently chided her, situating himself so he was facing her with his legs crossed. Clare mimicked the action. He took both of her hands in his, and she loved the feeling of his strong yet soft palms against hers. Sighing, he continued, "I love you. As soon as I got your text, I came here as quickly as I could." They made eye contact as Eli sighed sadly. "I guess I'm just trying to say that…we were best friends. We were best friends before we started really feeling anything besides friendship towards each other. You know, before you, I'd never really had a best friend before. That night, in the hospital, I felt like not only did I lose my girlfriend, but I also lost my _best friend_."

Clare's eyes watered up again, her throat beginning to close up as she began to get choked up. "What about Adam?" she morosely stared into his green eyes, her vision impaired from the light film of tears.

Eli let go of one of their interlocked hands as he reached up to wipe away a stray tear. "It's not the same. Adam and I don't share nearly the same kind of connection you and I used to. I really just want to go back to that." He finished, gazing into her icy blues.

"You were my best friend too, and I felt like I lost you. Leaving you that night was _so_ hard, Eli." Clare's tears dripped onto her cheeks and traveled down to the sleeves of her beige sweater. "I don't have anyone anymore, Eli. I treated Alli _so_ unkindly, and _we don't talk anymore._" She sobbed lightly, sighing as Eli pulled her into another hug, rubbing her back softly. She cried lightly into his chest, nothing like the hysterical weeping from the night before. After a minute, her tears slowed and her vision cleared. However, she refused to move out of his embrace. "Listen, Eli, I'd really like it if we could try being friends again. It's been lonely without our daily hang-outs with Adam and even when you and I used to study for English exams together." Clare tightened her arms around Eli's shoulders as he continued to rub her back. "I lied to myself; I said to myself that I didn't need you. I told myself I didn't miss you, and that I was glad you and I were separated from each other. I tried to convince myself that I should hold onto _it_; that I should save _it_ for you." She ran her hand in patterns along his back, reciprocating the action he was doing for her.

Eli, dumbfounded, rested his chin on her shoulder. "You were going to save what for me?" he whispered, dreading the answer.

Clare's chin wobbled as she felt herself starting to cry again. "My virginity," she cried.

"Oh, Clare," he continued to rub her back and gently kissed her shoulder.

"I always thought it was going to be you. You deserved it, not him. What was I even thinking? I thought we were going to be forever; we're _stepsiblings_. How could I ever have thought that Jake and I would last? I lied to my mom; to Glen…I just want to take it back." She shakily murmured, sniffling against his shoulder.

Eli pulled back from their hug, wiping all tears away from her face. "Listen to me, Clare Diana Edwards." She shifted her gaze back to him, eyes puffy and red. "You are still pure. _Everyone _makes mistakes, Clare. You haven't made _nearly_ as many as the other kids at our school and you should give yourself some credit for that."

"Eli, it should have been _you_."

"Clare," he painfully choked out, stroking her hands lightly.

"No. It should have been _you_."

Silence spread between the two of them. They were at a standstill.

Clare was the first to speak. "Jake does weed, Eli, and he's been hanging with this girl who I know _cannot_ be trusted. Not to mention, he hooked up with Jenna behind my back; I know you would never do that."

"I'm sorry, Clare." Eli whispered sadly.

"Don't be. Can we please just try being friends again? I know I've given you a million reasons to not trust me, but I'd really like another chance. I miss you." She concluded, desperately seeking a positive answer.

Eli sighed deeply, bringing his hands up to cup her face. "Of course we can be friends again. I miss you so much." His thumbs lightly caressed the sides of her cheeks, wiping away all traces of her tears. "Maybe we should call your mom, Clare. She should know where you are." He murmured, gently staring at her lips.

"After," Clare whispered shakily, wrapping her arms around his neck and frantically kissing him. Her lips moved with his in a sweet harmony as she buried her hands into his hair, bringing him as close to her as possible. She moaned passionately and kissed him fiercely, feeling his hands snake themselves around her waist.

Eli pulled away eventually, finding himself with Clare in his lap. He tenderly kissed her forehead and tilted her chin up to meet his eyes. "What does this mean?"

"This means," Clare started, softly snaking her arms around his waist and guiding him into a hug. He cautiously hugged her back, placing his arms lovingly around hers. She felt him lean his cheek on top of her head when she buried her head into his chest to listen to his gentle heartbeat. "That we're best friends, and we're in love." She finished, stroking his chest right where his heart was beating.

"Clare Edwards, may I kiss you?" Eli inquired, lifting his cheek from its perch on her head.

Clare giggled playfully, for once forgetting about what happened with Jake. "Oh, shut up!" she slammed her lips to his, taking him off guard and knocking him onto his back. She eagerly pressed her body into his, placing his hands on her hips and kissing his neck furiously. Minutes passed by before she sat back up, bringing him with her and holding him tight. "I love you."

"I love you, too. Now, how about calling your mom?" being the caring guy he was, Eli handed his phone to Clare, who had left her phone at home. She leaned into his embrace as the phone rang.

"Hello?" Helen Martin answered the phone eagerly.

Clare loved the way Eli's hands were rubbing her arms in their hug as she responded to her mother, "Hey, Mom."

"Clare! Glen and I were worried sick about you! Where are you?"

"I'm at the park with Eli. Mom, I left because Jake and I had an argument. I'm okay now; you don't need to worry anymore. I'll be home by dinnertime." Clare smiled as Eli kissed her forehead before beginning to run his fingers through her hair.

Helen replied, "Alright, sweetie. I'm glad you're okay. Please be home no later than 6:00."

"Okay, bye, Mom." Clare hung up, handing Eli his phone back.

She turned around in his hug and saw his eyes shimmering with question. "Clare, this is really complicated. What if your mom finds out about how you and Jake were…together?"

"Eli, she won't. I'm never going back to him. I love _you_." She silently begged him to believe her with watery blue eyes.

Eli heavily sighed. "Clare, that's not what I meant. This could get really messy. You said Jake does weed…he's not trying to get you to do it, right?"

"He asked me once; I said no. Eli, I don't want to think about Jake. I just want _you_." Clare muttered remorsefully, kissing his forehead and hugging him tightly.

Eli stood up and grabbed her hand. They intertwined fingers and began walking out of the park. "Let's get you home, Clare. I'll call you later." Smiling at each other, they walked over the grassy hills towards town.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3…

Clare awoke from a deep slumber in her dimly lit room to a light rapping on her bedroom door. She slowly sat up in her bed, gripping the blankets closely to her chest. "Yeah?" she called.

Jake stuck his head in her room. "Hey, are you okay? You got in pretty late last night."

"Jake, leave me alone; I don't want to talk to you." Clare whispered, her eyes squeezing shut tightly as she fell back into her fluffy pillows.

Jake walked inside, standing above her and looking in her direction. She did not meet his eyes. "Look, I'm sorry. I don't know what else you want me to say." He softly whispered, hoping his sister would understand. "Clare, I feel bad about what happened with Jenna."

Clare sat back up in bed, absolutely exasperated. "Oh really? You feel bad, do you? Well, that's not enough, Jake. You think feeling bad and acting all apologetic will get you somewhere in my heart, but it won't. We've been through it way too many times before."

"You know what? Fine. If you're going to be like that…fine, I don't care. I said I was sorry, so if you can't accept that, that's your problem." With that, he left the room. That is, until Clare followed him into the hallway in tears.

She stood before him, trembling with anger. "Jake, you took what I held closest to me. Then, you cheated on me with Jenna Middleton. I can't be around you anymore! Please, just leave me _alone_."

"_I took what you held closest to you_? Last I checked _you_ came onto _me_. You pulled me into your bedroom and offered to have sex with _me_! Don't act like I raped you or something; you wanted to do it! What happened with Jenna was _completely_ unintentional." He fired back, crossing his arms across his chest.

Clare glared at her brother. "I thought you were going to leave; I thought I had to have sex with you to make you _stay_! I needed you to _stay_! Now, I just want you to go. With Jenna, you and I both know you meant it. Marisol and Katie told me what you did." She paced in front of him, fiddling with her cross necklace, and then ripping the chain off and throwing it on the floor. "You know what? I guess I don't need this cross necklace anymore, symbolizing my _love and respect for God, when I basically just threw myself at my stepbrother! I guess I don't need to_ _believe in God anymore, huh?_ I guess so!" Clare only stopped pacing when Jake grabbed her by her shoulder. "Don't touch me! Don't," she hissed, kicking her necklace across the carpet and returning to her room. "I'm going out; tell mom I'll talk to her later."

"Okay," Jake sighed sadly, retreating into his room.

Precisely one hour later, Clare was facing the wall in Eli's room, taking deep breaths to calm her tears. Eli's hand softly rubbed her back as he propped himself on his elbow behind her. "Are you okay, Clare? I'm sorry you had a fight with Jake."

Clare sniffled lightly, continuing to stare around the now-clean room. "I can't escape Jake, Eli. He's always going to be there. His dad and my mom are _married_. I wish I had known what I was getting myself into. This isn't going to be okay," she cried, burying her face into his sheets.

"It will be okay, Clare. It's going to take time, but it'll be alright eventually. I promise." Eli continued to rub her back gently and lay behind her, draping an arm across her stomach.

Her breathing slowed and her heart ceased its slamming in her chest. Sighing, she grabbed his hand and laced her fingers with his. "Thanks for being here," she appreciatively whispered as he lightly squeezed her hand.

He sent her a friendly smirk as he hugged her from behind. "Of course," she smiled in return and enjoyed his arms wound around her waist. "What do you say we go somewhere? Somewhere special? Why don't we get to know each other again?"

Clare smiled at the meaningful thoughtfulness of his words. "I'd like that; I'd like that a lot."

"We'll go in about an hour; I'll wake you up. Get some sleep, Clare." He promised, rhythmically stroking Clare's cinnamon, shoulder-length curls until she fell asleep.

Clare sighed peacefully and felt sleep overcome her as Eli pressed a kiss to her forehead and lifted their laced hands to his lips.

One hour later…

"Clare, wake up." Eli gently shook Clare awake and loved the way her ice blue eyes gazed back at him curiously.

"Hey, are we going now?" Clare questioned, closing her eyes when she felt his finger gently stroking her cheek.

Eli laughed, removing his hand from her cheek and helping her off the bed. "I'd like to take you to a movie, if that's okay. Then, I'd really like it if we went somewhere for dinner."

"I really want to, Eli. That sounds wonderful." Clare piped up, hugging his waist tightly. She buried her face into his chest, thankful that this time it was from smiling and not crying; joy and not sorrow. "I have to be home by 11:00, but we've got until then. It's 6:30 now."

Eli smiled, his arms unwinding themselves from Clare's form. "Alright, let's get going then." With that, he led her outside to his car and they set out for the theatre.

"Two tickets for _Mysterious Love_, please." Eli requested, pulling out a few bills and handing them to the ticket booth worker at the theatre. Clare was right by his side as he paid, holding his hand tightly. His free hand was also wound around her waist as he gladly took the tickets and bid a thank you to the man. "Let's go in, shall we?" he charmed her as he led her into the main lobby of the theatre. "Snacks? I'm not that hungry, but if you want something…?" he chuckled.

Clare giggled and shook her head. "No, thanks, I'm okay. I can't wait to see this one, I heard it's amazing!" she giddily grabbed his hand and yanked him towards the hallway leading to the theatre. "Come on, slow poke!" she grinned and continued holding his hand as they strolled into the theatre after handing their tickets to the attendee.

Eli's brow crinkled as he tried to hold in his laughter. "Edwards, you're too much." He slowly followed her into the dark room that was lit up by the giant screen. His voice faded into a whisper as he followed her frantic leaps up the steps leading to the back. "Clare, slow down!"

She giggled hysterically as she felt the first real fun she'd had in months. As they settled into the seats, they realized they were the only two in the theatre. "It's pretty empty in here, huh?" she sarcastically whispered in his ear and blushed at their close proximity.

"Sure is," he whispered back, relaxing into his seat as meaningless ads and commercials droned on the screen. "You know, I'm really glad we're doing this. I've missed spending time with you so much." He honestly murmured in her ear as she blushed and purposefully rested her hand on the arm rest between the seats. "I've missed you in general; you're so wonderful." Eli continued to whisper sweet things in her ear until he noticed her hand inviting him to take it. "If you want me to hold your hand, all you have to do is ask." He joked, earning an excited giggle from Clare. He gently took her hand with his and laced their fingers together.

Blushing madly, Clare felt the happiest she had in a very long time. When his thumb began to stroke the back of her hand, she knew she was done for. She loved him, and there was no mistaking that at this point. "Can I lean on you?" she tentatively asked.

He scoffed, scooting closer to her so that she could lean her head on his shoulder. Kissing her forehead, he whispered, "When will the damn movie start already?"

"Patience, Eli, patience. It'll start soon enough." Clare laughed quietly and breathed in Eli's sweet scent. The darkness and exclusiveness of being in this room with Eli was beginning to overtake her senses. Relaxing and feeling truly happy, Clare enjoyed the support of Eli's shoulder and the soft strokes and caresses he made on her hand which was interlaced with his. "Eli?" she whispered, closing her eyes.

"Yeah?" he replied, keeping his eyes glued to the screen.

"I'm glad I'm here with you." She muttered.

Eli kissed her face down to her lips. "I'm happy to be here with you, too."

The movie began, and the two sat close together, trying desperately to focus on anything besides the other.

"That was the best movie I've seen in a _long_ time." Clare excitedly exclaimed, jumping up and down, still wired from the big kissing scene at the end of the movie.

Eli smirked, swinging their interlaced hands between them as they walked down the sidewalk of the street towards the restaurant. He gazed at her pale blue dress and gray sweater, overcome with memories of their very first date. "It was _okay_. Maybe a little cliché," he added playfully, earning a smack on the shoulder from Clare's free hand.

"Hey, _you_ just don't understand _true romance_!" she stuck her tongue out at him and giggled.

Eli snickered, loving the way Clare rubbed against his leather jacket. "_That's_ true romance? Oh, Clare, by now you should know _I_ am the master of romance."

"Sure, sure," Clare jokingly waved him off, her eyes lighting up when she saw the restaurant in front of her. "Eli, this is where we're eating?" her blue eyes widened as they came across the peaceful ambience of the rather expensive-looking place. As they walked inside, still holding hands, she gasped at the peaceful, bubbling fountain in the center that was teeming with floating lily pads.

Eli nodded. "I made reservations." He turned to the hostess. "Goldsworthy, Eli." The woman nodded and guided them to their table.

Clare gasped as tears invaded her eyes at her surroundings. The room was secluded away from the rest of the restaurant, decorated with twinkly lights and candles everywhere. After the hostess left to get their drinks, Clare sighed heavily and peered at Eli through her tears. "It's beautiful. You did all this for me?"

"Of course, sweetheart; I just figured we should talk." He answered, reaching over to gently grasp her shaking hand from across the table. "I know this is a lot, I'm sorry. I just wanted tonight to be special."

"It is special, Eli." Clare replied wiping away her tears and trying not to blush as his friendly smirk made its way onto his face.

A waitress appeared and brought them drinks, following by leaving to take their orders. Both Eli and Clare gazed at each other lovingly; surprised by the feeling the atmosphere was bringing them.

"Tell me about your life, Clare. I want to know how things are, aside from Jake." Eli said while Clare gazed back at him.

Sighing and rolling her eyes, Clare straightened her dress up and folded her hands on her lap. Sitting up straight in her chair, she connected her eyes with his. "Where to start? My dad is dating a girl named Jessica; Mom is pregnant; my dad and I haven't talked much since the divorce. They took your idea of the parental-switching from condo to our house, but my dad never went through with it. He stays in the condo since Glen and Jake are now living with us."

"So…you never see your dad anymore?" Eli sympathetically wondered, fixing his eyes on her beautiful icy blues.

Clare shook her head morosely. "He didn't even call me on my birthday. The only reason I know the name of the woman he's with is because I called and his answering machine came on. 'Hello, you've reached Randall Edwards and Jessica Kline. Sorry we couldn't answer the phone, but leave a message!'" she rolled her eyes and looked down at her placemat. The candles flickered around them, casting shadows across her pale face.

This broke Eli's heart, seeing Clare sad like this. "I'm sorry, Clare. I can't imagine why he wouldn't want to be involved in your life as much as possible." She lifted her eyes and to meet his green ones and smiled as he looked at her with apathy.

"I'm okay, Eli. Besides, I'm still getting used to this new lifestyle with having a new stepfather and stepbrother. I doubt I'll be able to handle meeting my dad's girlfriend until he wants me to anyway." She answered, thankful for the distraction of the waitress bringing their plates of food.

Eli took a sip of his Coke. "How are your classes?"

"Same old, same old. I'm glad I still have Dawes with you, though." Clare smiled as she sipped her water. "How about you? Tell me about yourself." She added with a wink, beginning to eat.

Eli shrugged. "Well, I got into U of T. I'm studying Creative Writing and English Lit there. Graduation's in a few weeks, and I'm doing fine in my classes." He waited for her to respond, but when she didn't, he added, "It's not much, though. There isn't a whole lot going on in my life right now, and I'm glad about that."

Clare nodded, taking another bite of her pasta. "That's amazing about U of T, Eli. I can't believe you're graduating. I'm really going to miss you." She sadly whispered the last part of her statement and averted her eyes from his to hide the tears.

"Hey, hey," he comforted her as he reached for her hand and held it tightly. "Clare, don't cry. Don't cry. I won't be far away. Besides, I was hoping you'd accompany me to senior prom?"

She gasped and lifted her eyes to meet his, smiling in happiness as he smirked back at her. "I'd love to, Eli! Last year's prom sucked."

"Yeah, no kidding." He replied dryly. "I got stuck bringing bread to awkward seniors and my best friend was shot. Not to mention, the dance was practically invaded by a gang member."

Clare squeezed her eyes shut at the harsh memory, nibbling at her bread. "I can't _believe_ that happened. Jake also ruined my night by breaking up with me. Then the idiot had to win me over at my own stupidity during the cabin trip."

"I remember that…the text at the hospital." Eli shook his head angrily at the rude text Jake had sent Clare. "That guy's an idiot for hurting you, Clare."

She shrugged. "I should've known he would. I mean, you're the one who found me when I was lost in the woods and kept me safe until Jake and Drew showed up. You know…I almost kissed you." She blushed at her revelation and locked eyes with his.

"I know." Eli answered while Clare's eyes widened with shock. "How did you know?" she gaped at him in surprise. "The way you were looking at me just gave me a feeling, I guess." He admitted, wondering if they'd ever address that night.

Clare stared back at him, finishing the last of her food. "I'm really sorry about that; I shouldn't have given you so many mixed signals."

"Well, I guess you just trusted Jake more. I don't blame you, Clare; he gave you a lot more reasons to trust him than me."

"Actually, not really. He told me at the very beginning that he only wanted a casual relationship; you and I were never casual. The problem was I wanted casual at the time. You and I got too intense, and after the breakup, I just wanted to feel something again. For the rest of that spring break, I worried about you. I never texted or called because I was pretty much positive you'd never want to speak to me again. Anyway, Jake gave me plenty of warning signals, but I ignored them. He took Katie to movie night when he _knew_ I liked him; he never _listened_ to me! He'd shut me up with a kiss if I ever talked about my problems! Jake kissed Alli, _my best friend_, during the cabin trip!" Clare crossed her arms over her chest indignantly and huffed at the terrible memory.

Eli frowned. "I had no idea about any of that stuff. He and Alli kissed?"

"Unfortunately," Clare spat, sipping her water.

"_That_ must be why you were so angry with Alli that you invited _me_ to ride home with you and Jake." He concluded, surprised at how it was all coming together now.

She nodded. "I felt really betrayed. We've never made up, you know. I lost my best friend."

"Are you going to make up with her? Maybe you two should apologize to each other." Eli suggested, smiling softly at the beautiful girl that was taking his breath away.

Clare reached for his and he gladly took it. "I'm definitely thinking about it. There's got to be something more to her story for her to have done that to me. She _tried_ to explain, but I didn't listen to her."

"I'm sure she'll forgive you. You two are best friends, and you'll forgive each other." He assured her and squeezed her hand gently. "Are you finished? It's only 9:45. Maybe we could hang out somewhere until I have to drive you home." Eli smiled sweetly at her, loving the way the corners of her pink lips etched themselves into a genuine returning smile.

When the waitress returned with the bill and everything was paid, Eli stood up and grabbed Clare's hand. "Coffee at the Dot?"

She eagerly nodded, recalling the kiss they shared while sitting at the front tables after their piercings. "Definitely," Blushing, she walked out of the gorgeous restaurant and returned close to his side as they walked to the local coffee place. They walked in comfortable silence until they were about halfway there, when Clare gently nudged his shoulder. "Hmm?" Eli acknowledged her, peering down gently at her petite form.

"Nothing," she giggled, earning an adorable confused look from Eli. They continued to walk until they reached the restaurant. Eli was about to travel up the steps when Clare stopped him. "Wait! The weather's nice tonight…why don't we sit outside?" She spotted the tiny table where they had kissed. "Come on," she pulled him to the table and sat down across from him.

Eli looked at her questioningly until it hit him: she was doing this on purpose. "You don't _really_ want coffee, do you?" he knowingly asked her as he felt her fingertips creep to the collar of his jacket.

She chuckled lowly and leaned closer to him. "No, I want you." She pulled him by his collar to her, smashing her lips to his softly. He kissed her back gently and pulled her from her chair to sit on his lap. Clare situated herself on his lap while continuing to kiss him gently until she felt his tongue find its way into her mouth. Sighing contentedly, she met his tongue with hers and wrapped her arms around his neck, bringing him as close as possible. Eli's hands rested on her waist, snaking around to hold her close to his chest. Clare slowly separated her lips from Eli's to look directly into his eyes. He leaned his forehead up slightly so it rested against hers. Their breath mingled as both teens caught their breath. "Please, don't leave me again." Eli begged as he felt himself finally slip over the edge, falling back into his deep, unconditional love for Clare Edwards once again. "You won't be able to push me away." She promised, leaning her nose onto his and gently rubbing them together. Their lips were brushing against each other for a few seconds before Clare kissed him again, deeply setting herself against him so there was literally no space between them anymore. As their lips met again and again, Clare gasped out, "I love you," and he returned the sentiment. Straying her lips from his, she pressed fast and eager kisses down his jaw to his neck. He sighed pleasurably and leaned his head to the side, giving Clare more space to gently suck. After about another minute, he couldn't take it anymore and pulled her head back up to his, reconnecting their lips.

Clare pulled back, gasping for breath as her heart thudded out of her chest. "It's been _way_ too long since we've _really _kissed. I forgot how _amazing_ it is."

His chest was slightly heaving as she placed her hand on his chest. "I know, Edwards, I know. You don't need to worry about losing me again. I think we can make it work this time."

"This is love," Clare murmured as she leaned her lips onto his for a few moments more. She brought her legs up so she could completely snuggle into his chest.

As he began to stroke her hair when the warm breeze ruffled it, he grew confused. "What do you mean?"

"_This_ is love, Eli," Clare replied, her eyes closed in bliss. "I had no idea what true love was. I don't think I've ever known until tonight."

Eli smiled and kissed her forehead. "I agree,"

Time passed by as they shared sweet kisses, some more intense than others, and talked about everything they could think of. Clare glanced at her watch, frowning when she saw that it read 10:45. "Eli, I have to get home." She sighed sadly as she felt his hand stop rubbing her back.

"Alright, come on, gorgeous." He gently helped her off his lap and walked her to his car which was parked by the restaurant.

Once she was home, it was 10:55. Eli walked her up to her doorstep. "I had a _wonderful_ time tonight, Eli." Clare murmured, fully meaning every word of it.

"Me too," he agreed, leaning forward to cup her cheek. She closed her eyes as she felt Eli's soft lips pressed onto hers with just the right amount of pressure. He stroked her cheek as he pulled away. "Goodnight," he reluctantly pulled away and hugged her one last time.

"Goodnight," she gasped out against his chest. "See you at school?"

"Guess you will," he replied, pressing one last kiss to her head and slowly unwinding his arms from her. He walked back down the steps and climbed into his car, driving off with the same old smirk plastered on his face.

Clare could not stop smiling as she turned and walked into her house. As soon as she stepped inside, she squealed and slid down the wall. Bringing her knees to her chest, she smiled to herself.

Maybe everything _would_ be okay.

_**"There she was, just a girl. She expected the world, but it flew away from her reach…life goes on, it gets so heavy…every tear a waterfall, in the night, the stormy night, she closed her eyes. In the night, the stormy night, away she flies." **_

Hey guys! I know I included Coldplay's "Paradise" lyrics at the end, but I was listening to it and thought it would fit. This fic is still about Coldplay's "Yellow", but I figured these lyrics could fit as well, only for this chapter. The rest of this story will be all about "Yellow". Thanks so much for reading. Please review! The more views, the faster I update!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4…

Clare sat with her feet folded underneath her on the couch, clad in light wash denim jeans and a pink tank top. A light tan suede sweater completed the look, along with a daisy headband. She was relieved to just be able to sit back and have some hot chocolate with Helen and not be bothered by her stepdad or brother.

"Clare, honey, I think we should talk." Helen lightly nudged her daughter's arm and turned to face her. Her brown eyes conveyed sadness. "I don't want to startle or hurt you, but this is something you absolutely need to know."

Jumping at the sudden voice, Clare averted her eyes from the television, set her hot chocolate on the coffee table, and turned to face her mother. "What is it?"

When Helen didn't respond right away, Clare knew something was seriously wrong.

"Mom," she begged in a whisper, eagerly staring into Helen's brown eyes with her bright blues.

Helen sighed deeply and almost reluctantly whispered, "Your father called yesterday. You were out with Eli, but he had mainly called to tell you something."

"What is it?" Clare fearfully answered, dreading the answer. Her mother only acted this way when things were really bad.

"Sweetheart, your father is sick. He's very sick. He said the doctor told him that he only has a few months left." Helen's voice was thick as she referred to Randall, her ex-husband and father of her two daughters who had cheated on her many times during their marriage. Even if she slightly resented him for cheating and wrecking their family, Helen knew being angry with him wouldn't help anything now. She knew her daughters needed the support from her right now, and she would have to put aside her anger towards Randall. Even though Randall had hurt her immensely, he was the reason she was blessed with Clare and Darcy. Losing him would still have an impact on not just her, but everyone.

Clare's eyes widened and she gasped slightly, bringing a shaking hand up to cover her mouth. "You're not serious, Mom,"

"I'm afraid I am, Clare. This is going to be very hard, but I want you to know Glen and I are here to support you. Jake will come around too, honey. We are a family, and we will get through this."

"What do you mean exactly, by 'he's very sick.'?" Clare's entire body was shaking with fear now as she realized that in a matter of months, she'd be losing the father whom she had not spoken to in almost a year.

Helen's eyes watered slightly, suddenly wishing to be in her husband's arms. "He's got cancer, baby. If they had caught it earlier, they'd be able to save him. It's too late though, sweetheart. I am so sorry." She hugged Clare tightly and squeezed tightly.

Clare clutched her mom's soft brown cashmere sweater as a single tear ran down her cheek. "Did he know something was wrong until they told him?"

Helen softly rubbed her daughter's back in soothing motions. "He'd been experiencing some pain, but he didn't think it was too serious, so he never went to the doctor about it. He lives alone, sweetie. None of the…_other women_…worked out. Jessica moved out last week." She hated saying the last part, but she had no other choice at this point. Clare deserved to know what was going on in her father's life.

"Does Darcy know?" Clare asked emotionlessly, her cheek slumped against her mom's shoulder. She felt numb right now. The tear left her cheek slightly moist, but it was the only one that had escaped her eyes.

"I plan to call her later tonight to let her know. She'll probably want to fly back so she can spend as much time as possible with him before he dies." Helen murmured sadly, pulling out of the hug and wiping the tear-streak from Clare's pale cheek. "Honey, maybe you should visit him. He's in the hospital for the remainder of this week for testing and observation, and then he gets to go home."

Clare's eyes widened. "Mom, I haven't seen him in so long-"

"Sweetheart, he is your father. I understand that you feel hurt and abandoned by him, but he loves you no matter what." She replied gently, tucking a curl behind Clare's ear.

"Oh yeah? He loves me? Then why won't he return any of my calls? Why do I always get his answering machine, and why didn't he call me on my birthday this year?" Clare demanded angrily, pressing her fingers to her throbbing temples.

Helen sighed, despaired. "Clare, Randall is just having a hard time adjusting to living alone. He probably thinks you're angry with him, and he's being immature by ignoring your calls. If you just go visit him, I'm sure he'll be very happy."

Clare ran a hand through her hair and laughed darkly. "Alright, so _I_ have to visit _him_? He doesn't even _care_ about me anymore, Mom!"

"That is _not_ true. Your father loves you _very_ much. Do you have any idea how much he regretted leaving you? He never wanted to leave this family, but he made that decision when he cheated. You need to be with him now, because Clare, you will regret not figuring things out with him before he's gone. You need to tell him you love him before it's too late, honey. Please, just try to let him explain himself to you." Helen practically begged her daughter; taking Clare's shaking hand and enclosing it with her own.

Clare glanced down at her hand within her mother's. "Okay, Mom. I'll visit him tomorrow afternoon." Finishing this sealed promise of faith, she leapt into her mom's embrace and felt just like a little girl again as Helen smoothed down her slightly wild curls and kissed her head gently.

"You're a good girl, Clare," Helen whispered to her daughter, who was clinging to her. "You're a good girl,"

Clare's voice was slightly muffled from burying her face in her mom's shoulder when she said, "I'm sorry for how I've been acting, Mom. I need to tell you something; please don't be mad at me. Please, promise me you'll still love me after I tell you this."

"What is it, honey?" Helen kindly released Clare from the hug and looked into her eyes.

"Promise me, Mom! Promise me you'll still love me after I say what I'm about to say." Clare's eyes watered in shame as she was about to reveal the truth to her mother.

Helen's eyes widened in alarm as she stared into her daughter's eyes, seeing a look on Clare's face she had never seen before. "I'll always love you, Clare. What did you do?"

"Mom…Jake and I…we…we had sex, Mom." Clare whimpered shamefully, hiding her face in her hands.

"What? You mean to tell me that the two of you _snuck behind me and Glen's backs_? You _lied to me_, Clare?"

Clare nodded her head in pure remorse and shame. "I'm so sorry, Mom."

"I don't even know what to say to you right now, Clare. I really don't. That isn't like you to lie to me! You've never lied to me until Jake came into your life!" Helen gasped, feeling betrayed and hurt by her own daughter.

"I wish I could take it back. I didn't even want to, Mom! I just felt _so lonely_ that I thought Jake would leave me if I didn't do it! He had been flirting with Jenna, and I got scared! I was _terrified_ that I'd be alone again!" Clare desperately attempted to make her mother see how she had felt. "You were _always_ going on trips with Glen, leaving me to myself! Jake was _all I had._ I'm not friends with Alli anymore because she kissed Jake, and I barely talk to Adam anymore! You weren't there for me. Dad was off with _Jessica_. Darcy's in _Africa_. I just wanted to feel loved."

Helen's eyes welled up with tears. "I never meant to make you feel that way, Clare. I love you so much." She gently kissed Clare's forehead before pulling back and saying, "What you and Jake did was absolutely unacceptable, but I believe we can work it out if we just sit down as a family and talk about it. Maybe we should get a family therapist as well. For right now, I want you to sit here and wait for Glen and Jake to come home, Clare." Helen sternly stood up and walked to her room with her cell phone in hand.

As Clare sat stone still on the couch, she felt absolutely _disgusting_ for what she had done. She heard Helen yelling at Glen on the phone and telling him he and Jake needed to be home by 10:30 PM. She did not want to have the family talk tonight, however. She felt hurt and sickened by the news of her father's on-coming demise, and terrible for her actions with Jake. She did feel slightly relieved to have told her mother the truth, however.

Her head snapped up when she heard Helen reenter the room. "The earliest they can be home from their contracting trip is tomorrow afternoon." Helen muttered, shaking her head.

"Mom, I'm so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking; I was _so messed up_."

"It's okay, Clare. I know you feel terrible, but I am _so proud of you_ for being _honest_ with me. What we need to focus on until tomorrow is your father, sweetie."

"Mom, I don't want to lose him," Clare cried out with no tears.

Helen sat beside Clare once more. "Baby, I know, I know. Will you be okay here by yourself for the night? Tina wants to know if I'll help her with some new architecture ideas for the firm tonight, and she wants me to stay over. She just recently lost a cousin who was close to her, so I didn't exactly want to say no."

"It's fine, Mom. I'll see you tomorrow." Clare grimly replied, folding her arms across her chest.

"I hate to leave you, sweetie, I really do, but Tina's my best friend. She needs me." Helen murmured softly, kissing Clare's forehead.

"It's fine. Go." Clare ordered, before she lay on her side.

Helen frowned before picking up her purse and walking towards the door. "Call me if you need _anything_, Clare. I love you."

The door shut before Clare could get another word out. Sighing, she scanned the dim room before her eyes landed on a pile of pictures on the coffee table. Intrigued, she picked them up.

The pictures revealed her and her father playing in the backyard with Darcy. Another showed Randall cradling a baby Clare while Darcy tentatively held her baby sister's hand. Helen and Randall were sitting side by side, Helen's stomach rather round while Darcy sat on Randall's lap.

Tears invaded Clare's eyes, and she quickly shoved the pictures into a drawer.

Just then, it her that she was going to be losing her father in a matter of mere _months_.

She grabbed her phone and dialed Eli's number, knowing she could not be alone tonight.

"Hello?" Eli answered right away.

Clare sniffled. "Eli, can you come get me?"

"I'll be right there, Clare." He promised, and that promise was kept approximately ten minutes later when his car pulled up to her house.

One hour later, Clare was snuggled under the soft covers of Eli's bed. His hand stroked her face repeatedly, trailing from her temple to her chin over and over again.

"What's going on, Clare?" Eli whispered concerned, moving his body closer to her pajama-clad form.

Clare opened her eyes and looked into his. "My dad has cancer, Eli." She expected herself to burst into tears at her own statement, but she just caused herself to cry silently.

Wordlessly, Eli pulled back the cover and climbed in beside her. "Come here," he crooned, gently pulling her to him and carefully wrapping his tender arms around her. She allowed tears to stream down her cheeks and clutched him tightly to her.

"_Why didn't he go to the doctor sooner_? Now it's _too late_ for them to do _anything_! He's going to be _gone_ in a few months!" She cried against him, feeling his hand start a rhythmic pattern across her back. "NO! This isn't OKAY! Don't do that! Don't do that! Please, don't try to calm me DOWN. This isn't OKAY! It won't be okay! Eli, stop, please!" Clare sobbed, starting to push against his chest angrily, desperate to take out her hurt on _someone_. She didn't want to hurt him, but it was all she could do. She was powerless.

Eli was shocked to see Clare like this; she never got this way. "Shh, Clare, it's okay. Yes, it is okay. It's alright, you're not alone." Clare sobbed harder and continued her shoves against Eli.

"Please, don't! I can't," she felt his lips press against her forehead gently. "DON'T do that, Eli! Please, don't do this to me!" She broke into incoherent sobs and broke down completely, not an ounce of mental strength left in her. Her body slumped against Eli's as she cried on him, too hurt and confused to do anything else at that moment.

"You're okay, you're okay. Breathe, Clare." He was elated when Clare took a small breath; it wasn't much, but it was progress, nonetheless. "That's it, there we go, shhh," he repeated this for almost ten minutes until she completely soaked the shoulder of his T shirt.

"Why? Why didn't he go to the doctor? It's too late now! He's going to die, Eli!" she cried, her cries muffled by her face's hiding spot in his shoulder.

"I don't know why, Clare. He should have. I'm sorry. If I could make it okay again, I would." Eli promised and reassured his girl before bringing the covers tighter around her. She didn't stop crying, so he attempted to calm her by kissing her forehead gently and leaning down to her ear. He kissed it before whispering directly into it, "I love you."

It took a good ten minutes for Clare to finally calm down enough to think about sleep. "I'm sorry I acted like that."

Eli smiled gently, stroking her shoulder and keeping her tight against him. "Nonsense, Clare, you were expressing your feelings. I'm glad you let me know how you feel."

"I'm going to see my dad in the hospital tomorrow, Eli. We haven't talked in almost a year." Clare whispered from her perch on Eli's chest.

He sat up gently, bringing her to sit in his lap. "That's great, Clare. You need to talk to him about everything. I'm sure everything will be just fine. This is a _good_ thing."

Clare scowled and turned away from him, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Eli moved beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "What is it, Clare?"

"I just don't know if I can do this. It'll be so sad." Clare whimpered and buried her face into her hands, leaning down so her face touched her knees.

Eli understood immediately and without a word, he wrapped her slumped form into a gentle, rocking hug. She allowed him to comfort her with his caring touch. He pulled her limp body back into bed and turned off the lamp. "I'm here," he whispered, feeling her relax and fall asleep in his arms.

_**"So then I took my turn, oh all the things I've done, and it was all yellow."**_

_** "…D'you know I love you so? You know I love you so." **_


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5…

Several gentle shakes of her slender waist and feather-light, tender cheek kisses caused Clare to awaken the next morning as sunlight poured in from the windowpane. Soft caresses were what she felt on the side of her face while she opened her tired eyes, which were slightly reddened from crying herself to sleep the night before. Once she had her eyes fully opened, Clare saw Eli smiling gently at her as he leaned down to her level so he could lean his forehead onto hers.

"How are you?" he asked, placing his hands on either side of her waist.

Clare shifted to get closer to his warmth. "I feel weak. I need to see him," she sighed, recalling the news of her father.

"I know. I'll take you there soon, okay? If you want, I'll go with you." Eli offered caringly, inching closer to her lips.

Clare eyed his full pink lips hungrily when they slightly parted, and she leaned up to bring her hand behind his black hair and brought his face down to hers. His lips crashed with hers softly for a comforting, chaste kiss. Eli ran his hands along the sides of her stomach and applied a bit more pressure with his lips so she could feel his support.

Pulling back in reluctance, Clare was the first to speak. "Y-you'll go with me?" Her heart hammered in her chest when he tucked her in close to his side and kissed her forehead.

"Of course I'll go with you." Eli smiled, lacing his fingers with Clare's.

Clare shuddered slightly at the idea of finally confronting her father. "Eli, can I ask you something?"

"Anything, sweetheart," Eli murmured with his lips pressed against her head. He stroked her hand with his thumb and leaned against the headboard of the bed, bringing Clare to sit on his lap.

She slumped against him and muttered, "How do I do this? He's going to be lying in bed sick and weak. He was always so strong. I don't know if I can do this!"

His chest rose and fell as he continued to hold her hand tightly and leaned his cheek on top of her head. "You can do anything, Clare. I believe in you. Talk to him, and tell him how you feel. This is going to be a hard thing for you to do, but you are _so strong_. Your determined, good heart will carry you through. You are so brave, Clare. I'm proud of you." Eli smiled as he spoke the words straight from his heart to the girl whom he loved so much.

"How do you know I'm strong? I break down sometimes." Clare shook her head in disbelief at his words. Her hand was lifted to his lips as he sank down into the covers to keep her warm.

"Look at me, Clare. Look at me."

Clare slowly turned around to see the green eyes that captured her heart staring straight into hers. A message was sent. The message was a simple communication between the piercing ice blues and the gentle deep greens. _I love you._

"I love you too, Eli, but how do you know I'm strong?" Clare wondered and used her free hand to stroke Eli's hand which was nestled with hers.

His fingers flexed gently as she played with them and smiles were exchanged for a few moments before Eli spoke up. "Your eyes," he whispered wondrously while staring at them in awe.

"What? What do my eyes have to do with any of this?" Clare sadly chimed in while his finger crept under her chin to coax her face closer to his.

Eli gently brushed his nose against hers as he felt her breathing grow heavy. "Those blue eyes symbolize more than a beautiful girl, Clare Diana Edwards. They symbolize strength, responsibility, faith, knowledge, and bravery. Your eyes show just how fearless you are." His hands cupped her face tenderly while Clare's breathing caused her to stutter and trip over her words.

"I-I…well…well, I…my eyes aren't…" Clare formed incoherent sentences while Eli smiled patiently and moved her face even closer, their lips mere centimeters apart. "…they aren't that great…I'm trying…to help my dad, but…I'm scared." She finally finished.

Eli stroked her face with his left hand. "Shh," he requested in the softest tone and allowed his eyelids to flutter shut as his lips pressed against hers.

She moved herself to lean against his chest and returned the kiss, eager to be comforted by his loving touches. Her wish was granted with his soft hug around her waist when he separated his lips from hers. "You don't even see how amazing you really are, Clare. I'm so glad I have you back in my life; I missed you. You don't have to do this alone."

"Thank you," she emotionally expressed her gratitude and flung her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.

"Always," he buried his face in her shoulder and hugged her back tightly, relishing every second of their five minute embrace.

Clare hated to pull away, but she knew it was time to go. "I guess we should go." She shook slightly as Eli helped her out of bed and left the room to allow her to change into her extra set of clothes.

Reentering the room, Eli eyed Clare's shaking form and gently grabbed her hand. His car keys jingled slightly while he quickly sent his mom a text to let her know he was taking Clare to the hospital and that he'd be back later.

"Are you ready?" He whispered as he stopped at a red light.

"Ready as I'll ever be," Clare responded in a shaky voice, her hands quivering.

Eli sighed. "I'd hold your hand, but I'm driving. Keep your hand on my thigh, okay?"

Clare quickly reached over and laid her hand on his thigh, instantly feeling safe and relieved by feeling him. "Thanks," she gratefully smiled.

The hospital wasn't very busy that day. A few coughing children were seen in the waiting room, and the front desk secretaries looked rather bored. The smell of chemicals entered Clare's nose, making her slightly light-headed. Eli kept his hand on her lower back as he guided her to the secretary.

"May I help you, miss?" The woman smiled kindly and peered down at Clare and Eli.

Clare smiled in return. "Hi, I'd like to visit Randall Edwards. I'm his daughter." Eli gently squeezed her hand as it started to shake.

The woman's eyebrows rose in surprise as she quickly looked up Randall's file on the computer. After a few moments of typing, she looked back up at Clare and smiled sympathetically when she saw that Randall was a terminal cancer patient. "He's in room 340 on the third floor, sweetheart. I hope you have a nice visit."

Clare bid her a sweet smile and accepted Eli's hand. The two then ventured down the hall to the nearest elevator and stepped inside.

The wait was _agonizing._ Even if it took only about one minute to get to the third floor, it felt like hours to Clare. Eli squeezed her hand gently even though that didn't cease the trembling it was doing. He leaned closer to her and whispered into her ear directly, _"You can do this, Clare."_

Clare nodded and sighed deeply as the elevator doors opened and revealed the second floor. Directly ahead of them as they stepped out was room 335. Just a few doors to the right and she'd see her father.

"I'm going to wait for you in the waiting room or the hallway, if that's okay with you?" Eli suggested before she turned herself into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her small frame and kissed her head gently. "It's okay, I'll be near. I'll be nearby. You can do this. Go see your daddy, honey."

Clare clenched her tear-filled eyes and gave two tears permission to fall. "I can't do this, Eli! I can't do this," she held onto him for dear life.

"You can; _I know you can, Clare_. He's waiting for you, Clare." Eli reassured his love as she was repressed by fear. He gently pulled out of the hug and nudged her towards the door with the sign that read: ROOM 340. EDWARDS, RANDALL. "I'll be right at the end of the hallway. Take all the time you need, Clare. _Take all the time you need_. I'll wait forever." He promised as he kissed her lips one last time before squeezing her hand, dropping it, and traveling back down the hallway and slumping onto the couch.

Clare took a deep breath and reached her hand forward to touch the cold, metal doorknob. The knob turned and she slowly opened the door. Stepping inside slowly and quietly, she immediately saw her father. Randall Edwards was weakly lying in the slightly elevated hospital bed, connected to several IV's and a steady heart rate monitor going in the background. His tired eyes were slumped and his body looked smaller than normal, as if he had lost a considerable amount of weight. Her heart snapped in half at the sight before her very own eyes.

"Dad?" she tentatively took a few steps towards his exhausted form.

His eyes opened slowly and his eyes brightened immediately when he saw his youngest daughter's face. "Clare," Randall's heart elated at the sight of Clare's appearance.

"Hi, Dad," Clare sat her bag on the floor and took a deep breath, reminding herself that the most caring guy in the entire world was just down the hall. Pulling a chair up to his bedside, she slowly sat down and willed herself not to cry upon seeing his almost defeated appearance.

Randall sat up slowly and stretched his somewhat meek arms out. Clare waited patiently for him to make eye contact with her while he got comfortable in bed. When he finally did, he said in a rather scratchy tone, "Could you get me some water?"

"Yeah, sure," she answered immediately, pouring some water into a small plastic cup and handing it to him. He sipped the water gratefully and shot his daughter a friendly, thankful half smile.

Randall's voice was quiet when he asked, "How's school going?"

"It's okay." She replied. "That's not what I came here for, though, to tell you how school is going." Clare narrowed her eyes slightly and felt anger conquer the fear racing through her veins.

A look of sheer confusion crossed her father's face, and then realization set in. "You know about the cancer."

"Of course I know! Mom doesn't keep things from me. _She's not that type of parent_." Clare retorted, glaring at her dad.

"Clare-bear, I'm sorry." Randall attempted to apologize, but Clare wasn't having it.

She scooted farther away from him. "You're sorry? Oh, could it be for leaving? Cheating on mom? Not returning any of my calls and basically leaving my life?"

"Yes. I'm sorry. I regret it more than you know, Clare." Randall ran the hand that wasn't connected to the IV drip through his sandy blonde hair and sighed.

Clare shook her head in disbelief. "I'm _so_ mad at you, dad."

"You have every ready to be. I don't even deserve you being here with me right now. I'm just really glad you came." He smiled gently but frowned when he noticed there were tears in Clare's eyes. "Your sister is flying in from Africa next week. It'll give you two a chance to uh…reconnect."

She felt her eyes swimming with tears, not even caring about her sister at the moment. "Dad, why did you leave? Why did you do it? You taught me _all my life_ to be _chaste_ and _not_ get _divorced _and _not have sex_, and then you turned around and did it all? You cheated on my _mother!_ Why? Why wouldn't you call me back or pick up your phone?" she demanded, feeling her control slipping from her grasp but gripping onto it with all that she had.

"Your mother and I started having problems after Darcy's situation, Clare. We never handled them, and we let our anger get the best of us. We lost the connection we had, but we ignored that and stayed together for our children. At my office, a new secretary was hired, and she tempted me. I felt horrible for it afterwards; you have no idea how bad. I really wanted to take it back." Randall's heart rate picked up slightly when regret and remorse settled into his mind. Clare's arms were folded across her chest and her legs were crossed indignantly. Sitting up as far as he could, he continued, "Clare, that secretary was eventually fired, and another one was hired. They _kept on coming_, one by one, and each of them came onto me. I never resisted, because I'd come home to a wife who _hated me_. I _hated_ lying to my family. You were growing up by then, though, Clare. You were in the ninth grade, and I knew that after Darcy had left, it would've hurt you more than anything."

Clare's throat itched and her body grew hot all over. Shifting in her seat so she sat on her hands, she fired back, "_Why didn't you call me back? _Do you even _know_ how _unwanted_ I felt, because _my own dad wouldn't call me back?_ You couldn't take the _time_ to _pick up the phone_. You couldn't be _bothered_ to _check your voicemails and call me back?_ After you moved out, that was the last I saw of you! You disappeared, just like you're about to disappear now." Tears streamed down her face as rain began to fall outside.

Randall used quite a bit of the small amount of strength to reach his hand out to her, and she accepted it, enclosing it in her own. His hands were not strong like they used to be. The veins were extremely visible, and the roughness had wearied down to soft flesh. "Clare, I was so guilty. I felt like such a _horrible failure_ of a _father_. I didn't answer your calls because I knew if I heard the sound of your voice, I wouldn't be able to keep myself out of your life. That's what you wanted, wasn't it?" he asked innocently, looking genuinely interested.

"Of course not," Clare was shocked that her father had ever considered such a thing. "Dad, you hurt me, but I still wanted you in my life. Why do you think I called? _People called you, dad. _Even mom called you, to see if you were okay. Darcy called you when she had breaks from volunteer work. Aunt Maurice called you, and so did a lot of your brothers and sisters. _Their kids called you_. We were supposed to have Thanksgiving dinner together back in October, dad. Did you forget? Was it _not important_, because you were _too busy_ _sitting around in your condo, feeling sorry for yourself?"_ Her hands clenched and unclenched while tears didn't leave her cheeks.

Randall's heart just about shattered when he saw his daughter cry. "I made a huge mistake by disconnecting myself from you, Clare. I just didn't want to mess up your life any more than I already did."

"That wasn't for you to decide! I should've gotten a call back from you! We never should've lost touch like that. Now what are we going to do, dad? I've got a man who is actually acting like a father to me now. Glen is my stepfather, and his son, Jake, is my stepbrother. Do you choose _now_ to be the time where you _waltz back into my life?"_ Clare desperately pulled at the hem of her gray T shirt, sniffling and holding Randall's hand tightly.

Randall's eyebrows came together in despair. "I am blessed to have you as a daughter."

That was all he said, and that was all it took for Clare to break.

""Dad! Fight this! Pull through, for me! I forgive you! Please, don't just leave us here!" Clare begged as she began sobbing and shoved the chair aside, wandering over to Randall's side.

He pulled her sobbing and shaking body onto the bed and wrapped his feeble arms around her. "It's okay, honey, and it's okay. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, sweetie. Sweetie, I am so sorry. I love you, baby girl." She sobbed into his hospital gown, feeling her tears begin to soak the thin material. He felt just like a father again as he comforted her just like he had when she was a little girl. Clare was always a daddy's girl. Darcy was always closer with Helen. A reunion was made that would never be lost just then, even with Randall off this Earth.

"Daddy, please don't go. We can fix this; you don't have to leave." Clare cried, hugging him to her tightly. "I don't want you to go."

He smoothed down her hair and gave a kiss to her forehead. "If I had any other choice, I'd stay here. I'd stay, Clare. You'll always be my little girl. Both you and Darcy will always be my girls." He smoothed and pats the curls Clare had inherited from his mother and gazed into the eyes she had gotten from Helen's mother.

"Daddy, I'm sorry for yelling at you! I just don't want you to go. Please don't. Stay so you can see your future grandchildren! Please!" Clare sobbed, sniffling and soaking his hospital gown with small amounts of tears. She pulled up his blanket to keep him warm. "Please, daddy,"

"Sweetie, I have lung cancer. I didn't go to the doctor soon enough. It's terminal now, Clare. I have no control," Randall's eyes watered as he tried to keep strong for his youngest daughter.

Clare cried helplessly into his chest and kept his hand in hers, not even caring about to IV tubes touching her. "Don't," she hiccupped, feeling him kiss her curls and smooth his hands over her arms.

"It's alright. I'll always watch over you." Randall promised, knowing that the first thing he'd look for on Earth after he died was his daughter. "I'll watch over you and love you forever."

Clare's phone buzzed with a text from her mom.

Clare, can you please come home? Glen and Jake are home. You can visit your father any other time you want. Why don't I go with you next time? I love you, sweetie.

"Is that from your mom?" Randall asked while she sent a quick reply and wiped her face, still crying.

"She wants me home. I promise I'll be visiting you every day until…" she trailed off, not wanting to finish her sentence.

He nodded in understanding. "Okay, sweetheart. We'll talk more about everything when I see you next. I love you."

"I love you too, daddy," Clare whimpered, hugging him to her tightly and climbing off the bed. She grabbed her bag and ventured into the hallway after shutting the door gently behind her.

Eli was the first thing she saw down the hall. He hadn't moved an inch. She let out a soft sob when she saw him lift his head to look at her. Taking in her appearance of messy curls and a tear-streaked face, he stood up and ran to her.

Clare ran towards him, meeting him halfway. They finally reached each other, and Eli wrapped his arms around her tightly as she flung her arms around his neck and sobbed in his shoulder. "It's okay," he murmured, sliding down the hospital wall and bringing Clare into his lap, hoisting her body against his and propping her head on his shoulder.

Her sobs were muffled by his jacket and he kissed her forehead continuously. "I still love him," Clare gasped while he rubbed her back and kissed her face. "He can't go…not fair…no…_no_!"

"I know, I know," Eli relaxed against the white wall and brought her face deeper into his shoulder.

Clare hiccupped over her sobs and gripped his shoulders tightly, her arms hugging him tightly to her. He gently patted her back and rocked her side to side. "I know, I know," he whispered in her ear, kissing down to her neck and nuzzling it with his nose.

She barely got out over a hiccup, "I _need_…him…thought…_didn't_…but…I _do_,"

He caringly slipped his arms below her underarms and patted her back just like a child. He rocked her side to side to the rhythm of a song he was humming. Clare recognized it immediately. It was her favorite song; he remembered her favorite song all this time.

'Yellow' by Coldplay.

Touched deep to the heart, Clare sobbed and hiccupped, tripping over words and not even caring about anything else. Eli, unfazed, continued to work his magic, gently swaying her and patting her back, hushing her gently and kissing her neck and shoulders.

People passed by. Some looked, some stared, some gave Eli sympathetic half smiles. Others smiled genuinely because of how sweetly Eli was touching her.

"You're beautiful. You're my baby. I'm not letting you go, so you can sob your pretty little blues out." Eli whispered to her before humming her song over and over.

Clare's face slunk against his shoulder, and she felt tired when he kissed her forehead tenderly and picked her up. "I'll take you home and call you later. I'll stay on the phone with you all night if you need me to, but you should really get some rest, sweet girl."

She fell asleep with her head in his lap during the ride home to 'Yellow'.

He connected his iPod to the car and played it, just for her.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6… Author's Note, real quick! I want to apologize if this chapter proceeds to suck. I'm typing this with a hand that has 6 stitches in it, so forgive me…

The following morning, Clare woke up extremely disoriented. Stretching her arms and legs out, the first thing she noticed was a note beside her on the bed. Curious, she picked up the piece of paper.

Clare,

Hey, beautiful. I drove you home yesterday after your hospital visit. Your mom and I brought you upstairs to sleep; she said she wants to visit your dad today with you…and, if it's okay with you, she wants me to come along. Just give me a call once you get this note, and let me know if you'd like for me to come to the hospital with you.

Love, Eli. P.S- Everything's going to be okay, Clare. I love you.

Her heart swelling with love, Clare smiled to herself and even giggled a bit at the giddy-love feeling Eli's message had given her. Grabbing her phone, she quickly scrolled down to Eli's contact and called him.

He picked up after a few short rings. "Hey, Clare," Eli answered, happy she had called. "Are you alright?"

Clare smiled in spite of herself and lightly stroked the fabric of her blanket. "I feel a lot better, that's for sure. Thank you _so much_ for bringing me home."

"Of course," Eli answered happily, glad that his girl was feeling a bit better after the way she had brokenly sobbed the day before. "I'd do anything for you, sweetheart. I assume you got my note?"

Clare's heart leapt at the opportunity of seeing Eli again. "I read it as soon as I woke up. I would _love_ for you to come with me and my mom to the hospital today." She smiled through tears, simply because her father was fading away with every day.

"I can meet you and your mom at the hospital whenever you need me to." He reassured her as he was just resting on the couch, contemplating ways to help Clare deal with her father's on-coming death. His poor baby; she'd be torn to pieces over Randall's death. It had to be difficult. Her father had not only cheated and divorced from her mother, but he had abandoned his own daughter. With Darcy out of the picture, there was no way Clare had anyone to talk to about this mess besides himself, when he indeed understood that he had no idea how Clare felt. His parents had loved each other long before he was born; Bullfrog and CeCe had met during their freshman year at Ottawa University and became great friends prior to the day Bullfrog had finally gathered up the courage to ask her on a date. As expected, he took her to a Metallica concert and gained her heart with a kiss that very night. "Clare, I just want you to know something, okay?" he quickly added, not wanting to lose his train of thought.

"What's that?" Clare replied, eager to hear his response while she snuggled into her pillow and realized she had slept until noon.

Eli's hands shook slightly with the desire to embrace her as he whispered, "No matter what, I'm here for you. I'm not leaving your side through any of this. You can…count on me, Clare. You can lean on me. Yesterday…you seemed so afraid and hesitant to cry in front of me. I could tell you didn't want to." He sighed, ran a hand through his hair, before continuing, "I will always be your crying shoulder, love. I promise you that much, and…I'll be there…for when it happens."

Clare's eyebrows rose at the finality of his speech. _Never_ in her sixteen years of life had she imagined she would meet a boy like Eli, who would stick around after everything they'd been through from day one. She had indeed left _his_ side, but it was the _right thing to do_. To have someone to lean on was exactly what she needed, but _what if Eli got tired of it?_ What if he wanted her in his lap because she was content, not crying her eyes out? Maybe pretending to be happy was the way to go. Clare made a decision right then and there; no more tears in front of Eli. He deserved some of the past happiness to radiate from Clare and into his heart. She needed to be strong for him. "Oh, uh…thanks, Eli, but…that won't be necessary. I know my dad's not going to be around for much longer; I've sort of accepted it."

Eli grew confused. Was Clare trying to hide herself from him? "Clare, you don't need to be strong for me."

_Darn it. He totally read my mind. _Clare thought while sighing heavily and jumping out of bed. "Um…Eli, I'm going to be just fine. Thank you for your support. I'll take a shower and then call you later about when we should meet at the hospital; I need to talk to my mom for a while." She hadn't meant to come across as bitchy, but acting this way was the only possible way she could keep it together until after Randall's death. She was not going to cry in front of Eli ever again. Jake didn't like it when she did that, and her previous breakdowns with Eli probably bothered him deep down. The last thing she needed was to push everyone away.

Eli could tell something was wrong, but he decided to leave it alone and let her go for now. "Okay, but if you need anything, I'm here. I'll talk to you later, Clare."

Clare bit her lip and ended the call. She _hated_ lying to Eli, but it was her only option. In order to stay strong and not risk losing him, Clare needed to act like everything was alright. In reality, this entire thing was tearing her apart. She would cry in private when her father died, but not in front of Eli. He didn't deserve it.

"Clare, can you come downstairs?" Helen called from the kitchen.

"Yeah," Clare shouted, trotting down the steps and waltzing into the kitchen. Inside, she found Glen sipping from a steaming mug of coffee and reading the newspaper. "Hey, Glen," Clare smiled kindly, earning a wave from her stepfather. "Where's Jake?" she asked crossly, noticing her brother's absence.

Glen looked up, startled. "He took Jenna to the Dot for lunch."

"Of course he did." Clare rolled her eyes, dodging a glare from her mother. Jake had never taken _Clare_ anywhere.

"Clare, I made you some lunch. Why don't you take it with you into the living room and we can talk?" Helen suggested, handing a plate to Clare and gesturing for her daughter to follow her into the opposite room.

Clare warily followed and sat beside her mother on the couch. She began to eat the peanut butter and jelly sandwich and munch on the potato chips and apple slices her mom had prepared for her. Turning to face her mom while setting the plate on the glass coffee table, Clare averted her full attention on Helen.

"Sweetie, I'm worried about you." Helen began, her large brown eyes becoming sad instantly.

Clare's blue eyes widened. "What do you mean?" Her mom couldn't be thinking about…

"Honey, would you be opposed to maybe…talking to someone?" her mom suggested gently, reaching over to rub her daughter's pajama-clad knee.

Clare sighed; she knew this was coming! "Mom, I don't need a therapist! I'm _not_ crazy! I have Eli. He'll help me. No, actually, _I have myself_. _I_ can pull through this, mom. I can do it alone. _I don't need anybody_." She grew angry fairly quickly. It wasn't like some stranger with a medical degree could help her! She'd already lost her virginity! She had made mistakes, and losing her father was the price to pay for it.

"Clare, talking to a therapist doesn't mean you're crazy. I'm very disappointed that you would say that. Eli sees a therapist, and he's improved so much. I can tell just by the way you talk about him. Honey, you cannot depend on yourself alone through this. This is an extremely traumatic thing to go through, and I'm hoping you will at least consider talking to someone about it." Helen gently told Clare, placing an arm around her daughter's lower back.

Clare sighed. "Fine. I'll _think_ about it."

"That's my girl. Now, how about we meet Eli at the hospital at 4:00? That marks the start of visiting hours. We can stay until 7. Then, Eli can stay for dinner." Helen smiled gently, smoothing her daughter's curls behind her ears.

"Jake better not be home when Eli comes over." Clare gritted her teeth, immediately hating saying Jake's name.

"Now, now, honey. He's spending the night with a friend from his home town. I wouldn't suggest Eli coming over if he were going to be present; I know that would have been uncomfortable." Helen pressed a gentle kiss to Clare's forehead.

"Sure," Clare answered, relieved that Jake wouldn't be there to ruin everything. She gave her mom a quick hug before running upstairs and jumping into the shower.

Just a few hours later, they arrived at the hospital and walked into the main lobby. Clare found Eli leaning against the reception desk to the far right, giving Clare and a warm smirk that heated her inner core and lightened her heart.

She quickly approached him while Helen signed all three of them in and threw her arms around him. Taken aback, Eli gently folded his arms around her waist and squeezed lightly. Clare sighed and buried her face in his neck before she heard Helen cough.

"Ahem," Helen asserted, but she couldn't help but smile at how gentle Eli held her. She also loved that the very second they departed from their embrace; Eli bumped Clare's hand instinctively. Her daughter looked down and blushed, shyly opening her fingers. Eli smirked and softly slid his fingers in between Clare's, kissing her cheek tenderly. "Come on, you two." She laughed and led the couple to Randall's room.

Helen was hesitant, but found herself entering her ex-husband's room anyway. Clare and Eli followed her inside, instantly calmed by the peaceful, melancholy atmosphere. Randall had been looking out the window and into the city below him, but he heard them enter and sat up to give them his full attention.

"Helen," he gasped, surprised to see his ex-wife here. "Eli? It's been so long!"

Eli smiled. "It's very nice to see you, sir,"

"Please, call me Randall." He grinned, gesturing for all three of them to sit down.

Birds chirped outside while Helen blushed at the awkwardness of seeing her ex after so many months. Clare dragged two more chairs to Randall's bed side, instantly feeling sorry for her mother. This was Helen's idea, though. At least her parents would be together again, in a sense, before her dad passed away.

Eli and Helen sat on either side of the chair in the center so that Clare could sit between them. Sitting down gently and hating the way her father was gazing at her, Clare felt Eli's eyes bore into hers. He held out his hand for her and tried to not be hurt when she refused it. Helen noticed this as well, but she did not say anything.

"Thank you so much for coming, Helen, Eli, and Clare. I really appreciate the company." Randall smiled sheepishly, his chest steadily rising and falling to the beat of his heart monitor.

Clare nodded her head. "Dad, when do you get out of here?"

Her dad's face fell, and she didn't like that at all. His expression was twisted with anguish, and Eli and Helen both leaned forward a little bit while Clare rested her elbows on her knees. When he didn't speak right away, Clare urged him on, "Dad,"

"Sweetheart, the thing is… I can't."

"What…what do you mean, you can't?" Clare whispered frantically, feeling Eli's hand gently brushing her side. She scooted her chair farther away from him, alarming him slightly.

Randall's face crumpled as he took a breath with great difficulty. "I…I can't go home, Clare. I'm not leaving the hospital."

_"Why?"_ Clare demanded, pulling at the sleeves of her peach sweater.

Randall reached for his water cup with shaky hands, lifting it to his lips and sipping from it. "The doctor says that…the cancer cells are increasing in my lungs. They don't think my body is strong enough for radiation or chemo. They originally said I only have a few months left, but…they took blood samples and did multiple tests, and they found out that the cancer is increasing every day. I only have about three weeks to a month left." He grew emotional, tears spilling from his dark blue eyes at his statement. Shivering, he weakly pulled the hospital blanket up to further secure his body with warmth.

Clare felt like a bullet had been sent right through her heart. _This couldn't be happening._

Helen gasped silently, gently rubbing Clare's back. "Randall, I am so sorry."

"I'll be alright, Helen. I have faith in the lord to take me to heaven. I just want us to spend as much time together as possible, before…" he trailed off, looking into the eyes of his past lover. In this very moment, he wished he had never cheated on her. He wished he could rewind to Clare's first Christmas, where baby Clare and 4-year-old Darcy were both sitting by the Christmas tree and excitedly opening presents. Randall had filmed this, laughing at the silly, confused look on Clare's infantile face, her ice blue eyes widened with ecstatic happiness. Darcy wore pink footie pajamas and was ripping open Barbie dolls and other gifts. The camera had been aimed at Helen, who giggled endlessly while helping Clare open her new baby blanket and a few stuffed animals. That day had definitely been the day Randall had received happiness. His eldest daughter, whom he never imagined would one day be raped and almost lose her life, was innocent as can be, perched on her mommy's lap. Clare he knew would be a daddy's girl because of the way she smiled at him and crawled into his lap.

Clare's eyes became dangerously sparkly as she avoided Eli's and her mom's attempts to touch her comfortingly. She stood up, towering over her father. The man in the bed was just scared and…weak. He didn't know what to say anymore; his death was approaching, and he'd be forced to leave…this…the greatest thing in his life; his girls. "When did you find this out, dad?"

"Yesterday," he rasped out, hating the heartbroken way Clare's face began to crumple.

"Well, thanks for letting me know! I really appreciate it!" Clare gave Eli and her mother one last look before storming out of the hospital room.

Eli started to stand up, but was stopped by Helen. "Eli, just let her be for now. She needs to cool down a bit."

Randall bit his lip guiltily. "I'm sorry."

Eli sighed. "Don't be. Clare's just upset."

"Eli, I want to ask something of you. Just this one thing and not anything else." Randall fixed his eyes on Eli while Helen stood up to excuse herself.

Eli immediately replied, "Anything, sir,"

Randall smiled gently. "Take care of Clare for me, please? I need you to take care of her. She's a sweet girl, and I can't be here physically to protect her. I've already missed out on so much of her life. Please, just stay with her."

"Of course, sir, er…Randall. I love her." Eli answered his heart beating faster by the minute.

Randall grinned. "I know you will, boy. I know you love her as well."

Eli's eyes filled with tears. "I will always take care of her. I've never loved someone so much in my life; I've only had one girlfriend before Clare, and she doesn't begin to compare to how I feel about your daughter."

Randall's heart warmed by the thought of his daughter before lovingly cared for by this fine young man. "You're a good man, Eli." Suddenly, his breaths became shallower, decreasing. "E-Eli…g-get the doctor," Randall choked out, as his blood pressure kicked up and his heart monitor beeped furiously.

Alarmed, Eli jumped out of the chair and ran out the door. "Help! Somebody help!"

Helen ran to Eli. "What is it, Eli?" she whispered, dreading the answer.

"He's…he's dying, Mrs. Martin. I think…I think this is it." Eli cried out, remembering the feeling from when he was waiting to hear about Julia's condition just a few years prior.

"Oh, Eli," Helen sobbed, feeling emotions punch her in the heart and gut. "Oh, goodness, Eli," she broke down in the middle of the hallway while doctors and nurses rushed into Randall's room. The rapid beeping of the heart rate monitor did not slow nor quiet while Eli gently held his girlfriend's mother. They slid down to the floor while Helen grasped him with everything she had, hating the feeling she was getting.

"Mrs. Martin, where's Clare? She should know about this." Eli asked frightened, rubbing Helen's back as she sobbed. "Shh, it's okay, it's okay," he murmured to the woman whom he hoped would one day be his mother-in-law.

"I-I don't know, Eli! Please, just…text her and tell her to come up here. She's probably…in the…lobby," Helen gasped through sobs while they both listened as doctors and nurses shouted to one another, desperately trying to save a man's life.

Eli quickly sent a text to Clare and then placed his phone back in his pocket, holding Helen close and gently soothing her. "Shh. It's okay, Mrs. Martin. It's…okay."

"Oh, god, Eli," she cried, resting in his embrace and wishing her father were still around to hold her like this, just the way he had when she hadn't been able to get pregnant. Clare was her miracle, and the man who had made her possible was losing his life.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7… Before I begin this chapter, let it be known that for anyone who has lost a father, I am deeply sorry. I myself have never had a father, but I wrote this to its full extent and to the best of my ability. I am sorry if this chapter brings sadness upon any of those who will be emotionally affected in any way. I would like to credit: "I'll be the Father Now" by Dry September and "I Will Remember You" by Sarah McLachlan for helping me with this chapter. Please enjoy, dear readers, and please review.

Glen had arrived at the hospital immediately after receiving an urgent call from Eli. Holding Helen at the end of the hallway, still listening to the doctors rushing around trying to save Randall, Glen did his best to comfort his wife. He didn't recognize Eli, but he did not ask further questions when Eli had stated that his wife needed him at the hospital.

Helen, still hysterical, wept endlessly in her husband's arms, reciting quiet prayers for Randall. "God bless him, he made a mistake, but bless him, Lord," she repeated over and over again while a very sympathetic Glen smoothed down her brown hair and kissed her tear-stroked cheeks.

Meanwhile, Eli desperately ran around the hospital trying to find Clare. He had not seen her since she had stormed off, and she lacked in answering his several texts and calls. "Come on, Clare, pick up!" Eli shouted into his phone desperately, panicked when he heard Clare's peppy voicemail _again._ He had called her _six times_. He had texted her _ten times._ Wherever his girlfriend was, she didn't know that her father was dying in the very same building.

"Excuse me, Miss," he murmured to a nurse who was blocking the elevator.

She smiled apologetically but quickly moved out of the way when she saw how anxious the boy was.

Quickly entering the elevator, Eli counted down the seconds it took to get back to the first floor where the lobby was located. _Thirty seconds; way too long._ As soon as the elevator doors opened, Eli jumped out, glancing around the entire room for Clare. All he saw, however, were a few coughing children sitting with their mothers and visitors of patients leaving. _**Where was Clare? She had to know what was going on!**_

A shaking form was spotted by his green eyes. _Could it be…? _Eli wondered, but he soon knew exactly who it was when the girl lifted her head to meet him with her _brilliant_ blue eyes. Her eyes were not filled with tears, but her face was slightly read. Eli noted this sadly, knowing she'd have many tears to shed later. Randall had not shown any sign of improvement. He had stopped breathing, and the doctors were still currently trying to resuscitate him, just three floors above them.

Eli shook his head quickly and sprinted over to Clare. She smiled weakly at him, but she soon noticed his exhausted and frightened appearance. "What's wrong?" Clare inquired, leaning on her elbow, uncomfortable in the waiting room chair.

"Clare, your dad started having breathing trouble about five minutes ago. I've been looking all over for you! I called and texted you! _We have to go, now._" Eli didn't even let her ask any further questions, picking her up and running to the elevator.

Clare remained silent in the elevator, tiny beads of sweat dripping down her temple. Her dad was going to die? After the things she had said to him? The last thing she had said was, "Well, thanks for letting me know! I really appreciate it!" The _only_ thing worse than losing him would be losing him with _those words_ being their parting goodbye.

"Eli," she whimpered, burying her face into his chest as he gently set her on her feet when the elevator doors opened once more. Eagerly, she took his hand and allowed him to frantically lead her to the room where her father was.

A few nurses and doctors lingered outside the room, and Helen was still sitting in Glen's arms, shaking like a leaf. "Mom?" Clare whispered, still hanging onto Eli's hand.

Helen smiled sadly, tears completely filling her brown eyes. "He's stabilized; they don't think he'll make it through the night, honey." She sobbed again and Glen quickly brought her into a hug again.

Eli gasped lightly, feeling his heart tear slightly at his girlfriend's pain. He felt his hand being squeezed extremely tightly and his feet were being dragged forward. Slowly, they made their way into Randall's hospital room. He squeezed back. Of course he did.

"Daddy?" Clare breathed out when her eyes landed on her father. Randall laid sickly pale, still, breathing with the aid of a machine. Her voice was rather high-pitched, and she quickly covered her mouth with her hand at the sight of him. Hope deflated out of her heart. His heart beat extremely slowly, and his eyes were glazed over while his forehead was soaked with sweat.

Upon seeing his daughter, Randall did not have the strength to smile, but he wanted to.

Clare sobbed lightly, running to her dad's side while Eli stayed close by her side. "Daddy, you're going to be okay." She shooed Eli away from her, climbing into the very small space that was left beside her father's extremely still form. "Just don't close your eyes," Clare murmured, taking his limp left hand into hers. She gasped at how _cold_ it was. "Daddy, can you speak? Let's talk about the time when we all went to the beach! Remember? I-I was f-five, and I c-couldn't swim in the o-ocean…yet…but y-you lifted me onto y-your sh-shoulders, and we drifted over the waves." Eli's heart felt another punch as he watched his girl slowly falling apart, talking softly to her dying father. Randall was looking into her eyes with his own glassy ones, taking in his daughter's beauty and noticing the boy who would always take care of her standing beside his bed, trying not to cry. Eli was biting his lip to hold back tears, but they came anyway. Clare was muttering, "D-Darcy got a little sunburned, but y-you and mommy bought her an i-ice cream c-cone to make her feel…better. We stayed in th-that nice hotel in Wasaga. I-I'll never forget, daddy."

Eli's heart just about snapped in two when he realized the dying father of the girl whom he loved so much was separating them. Randall was slowly fading away, but yet so fast. The beeping monitor was slowly decreasing, and Eli's voice shook when he said, "C-Clare," he wanted to take her into his arms, but he knew allowing her time with her father was what was needed right now. _There was only so much time left_.

It took most of Randall's strength to reach his cold hand out to Eli. "E-Eli," he choked out, tears not even bothering to provide him with clear vision to see his daughter's future husband.

Quickly taking Randall's hand and enclosing it in his own, Eli looked down tearfully at the weak man. "Y-yes, sir?"

Clare was weeping silently into her father's side, basking in his comforting, gentle strokes of her fingers enclosed between his and forehead kisses. "Daddy, do y-you remember…that time we…" she trailed off, searching and racking through her frazzled mind for the best, happiest memory to share with him. "Y-your sister, Aunt Jocelyn, had h-her first b-baby? My cousin, Leila, i-is five n-now. We a-all went to the hospital, and you w-were so happy to get your first ni-niece. She's got a younger brother n-now. Marcus? Do you r-remember him? He's two. Daddy, we were so excited to meet Leila! She-she was a comp-complicated birth, and it's a miracle she's a-alive. We were…so happy…we prayed t-together in the hospital waiting r-room that day." Clare squeezed her eyes shut tightly, tears making salty tracks down her face.

Eli, sitting in the cold, plastic chair, held onto Randall's hand tightly, still waiting for a response from the man. "Y-you're a good man, E-Eli. Please…take care…Clare…" Randall shivered slightly, feeling his heart rate lowering minimally by the second. He was unable to form coherent sentences when he felt Clare bury her face into the side of his neck, bawling softly.

"I-I will, sir." Eli promised, wishing to take Clare into his arms and take all of her pain away. He knew, however, that this was not the time for that.

Just then, Helen entered the room gently. Eyes red from the half hour of sobbing she had done, she approached the foot of the bed and placed a hand on Clare's back. "Sweetheart, Randall, Eli, I think we must know s-something right now. We are all together one l-last time." She felt Eli's sympathetic, sad green eyes gaze at her before she had to approach Randall. Shocking Eli and Clare, Helen leaned down and placed the gentlest of kisses on Randall's forehead. "I know we've had ours fights, but you gave me my girls, Randall. For that I will be forever grateful; rest in peace. You made a mistake, but the Lord is ready to take you now. It is going to be alright, Randall. Just let Him take you gently." She lifted her lips from his forehead and caressed his cheek softly, casting one last glance at Eli and her daughter before making her way to the hallway. Glen caught her swiftly and placed a protective arm around her while handing her a coffee.

"I love you," Randall whispered in a rather scratchy voice, his lips dry when he pressed them against her head. He felt his heart fading to slow nothingness when he turned his face toward the ceiling, searching for the Lord. "I love you both," he murmured. "Tell D-Darcy…same thing…daddy loves his girls,"

Clare whispered to him in all the strength her voice could muster, "Darcy's flight was delayed; she can't be here right now. I'm so sorry. She wants to be, I-I know she does! I miss her too." Gently kissing her dad's cheek and resting her hand in his above his heart, Clare grew frightened at how slowly it was beating. His pulse was fading. "Daddy, you know I love you, right?" Clare kissed her dad's shoulder and snuggled into his side, shoving her face into his neck again.

Eli couldn't help but sob at this point. He clamped a hand over his mouth when _he felt no more pulsing against his own wrist. _

Something didn't feel right. Randall was…cold. Still. Unmoving.

Tentatively, Clare lifted her face from his neck and whispered into his ear in the shakiest voice ever, "Daddy?"

_No answer. Just the terrible sound of the heart machine flat lining…_

_"I will __**remember you**__. Will you remember me? Don't let your life pass you by…weep not for the memories."_

Gasping and feeling the breath knocked out of her, Clare gripped onto her dad's cold, limp, and lifeless body. "Daddy," she kept her eyes closed tightly as she sobbed, wishing her dad could wrap his arms around her. "God, did you take him," she sobbed quietly.

Eli put his head down, never letting go of Randall's ice cold hand. His shoulders shook with sobs while he desperately kept them silent in order to stay strong for Clare. _Tonight was about Clare. He was going to take care of her. _

Ten minutes passed by. Doctors passed by the room, but they did not disturb the two. Understanding that sometimes loved-ones of recently passed patients need some time to grieve, they did not do so much as enter the room. They could see from a distance that Randall was dead, his head turned towards the heavens.

Clare hung onto her dad, her arms looped around him. She closed her eyes, relishing just being able to be close against him one last time. "Daddy, you know I love you." Tears still streamed down her face, but at a slightly slower pace.

Sobbing deeply, Helen entered the room, having the doctors already informed her that her ex-husband had indeed not made it through the night, just as they had predicted. Her heart snapped in two upon seeing her daughter hugging his lifeless form to her. "Clare, sweetie, we need to leave him now. Let him rest in peace," she gently approached the foot of the bed, eyeing Eli, who shared a knowing glance at her. Seeing Eli's tear-streaked face and shaking shoulders when he again buried his face into the bed sheets, Helen squatted down to his level. "Eli, sweetheart," she placed a hand on his back and softly covered his hand with hers.

Glen entered the room then, knowing Helen wanted him to reason with Clare. "Clare, honey, come on," Glen placed a gentle hand on Clare's bare arm, rubbing it slightly, hoping to be comforting. "I know you want to stay here, but we can't."

"You wouldn't understand." Clare's eyes were glazed over when she finally opened them, fresh tears moistening the round blue orbs.

Glen sighed as Helen tended to Eli. "My dad died when I was around your age; I know how it feels. Clare, honey, we can't stay here. Let's get home, okay?"

"I'm not going anywhere." Clare's attitude was incorrigible as she stubbornly tightened her grip on her father, whose body temperature was dropping rapidly.

Eli sobbed silently into the covers, his face slightly touching Randall's leg, which was covered by the sheets. Helen knew he was recalling the memories of being in this very position that Clare was in when Julia had passed. "Eli, sweetheart, shh," Helen murmured, gently plucking Eli's fingers off Randall's and disentangling their hands. Eli shook his head limply, only thinking of Clare. "I need to help C-Clare."

Helen sighed. "I don't think she's got any intent on leaving here anytime soon. She's not going to listen to Glen," she whispered into Eli's ear while rubbing his back, gesturing with her free hand to Glen. Glen was unsuccessfully convincing Clare to leave the bed.

Defeated, Glen retreated from his stepdaughter's broken, crying appearance.

"Eli, if you could get Clare off the bed, it would be greatly appreciated. They'll have to forcibly move her if she doesn't move soon, and I don't want her to have to go through that. Please, honey, for me." Helen murmured softly into the sobbing boy's ear.

Glen waited for Helen, wrapping his arm around her and guiding her out the hospital room's doorway and into the hallway.

Picking himself off the ground, Eli stood up and used the sleeve of his soft, gray sweatshirt to wipe his tears away. Gently approaching Clare's bed with the softest footsteps, he saw that Clare was shaking like a leaf in the autumn breeze. _He hadn't even _noticed_ she was crying._ The obligation to hold her was starting to take over him, driving him _nuts. _His footsteps echoed off the tile floor, filling the hospital wing with sweet melancholy.

Clare rested her head on her father's ice cold chest determinedly, never moving her eyes from the point she had focused them on across the room.

"Clare, we have to let them move his…body. He's not here anymore, Clare." Eli rubbed her back in gentle motions, forming patient circles on her back.

Clare snuggled closer to the body. "Shut up, Eli." Clenching her eyes shut, she hid her face in her dad's shoulder, not wanting Eli to see her tears.

Eli leaned down to her level so his hands were on his knees, completely bent over. "Sweetie, h-he's not here anymore. He's…in your h-heart. We _can't _stay here. _I'm so sorry_." Peering over at Clare, he saw her lips parting as she began to say something.

"He was fine when we were visiting him. I stormed out when he told us he didn't have much time left. I-I guess…" she trailed off, gulping to complete her sentence properly. "I-I-I guess I messed up big time. Now he's…now he's gone. He's gone!" Sobs forcibly ripped their way out of Clare's chest while she cried loudly into her dad's limp shoulder. She gripped his hospital gown, emptily crying as she let his arms fall out of the embrace. The limpness of them frightened her, and she sobbed, gasping for clean, clear breaths.

Eli's heart broke for the girl as he leaned down and scooped her into his arms. Keeping one arm wrapped around her back and the other looped under her knees, Eli carried Clare over to the chair across the room. She gripped onto him as if he were the only thing keeping her afloat in her river of tears. Her sobs were the waves that were attempting to wash her under, but _he would never let her drown. _

_"I'm so tired. I can't sleep; standing on the edge of something much too deep. Funny how we feel so much, but we cannot say a word."_

"Shh, shhh," Eli sat her down onto his lap and gently ran his hand down her back. Clare sobbed and shook against him.

"I'm sorry," she cried out in anguish, clinging to him.

_"I'm __**so afraid**__ to love you, but more afraid to lose; Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose. Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night; gave me everything you had, oh you gave me __**life**__."_

_"Weep not for the memories…I will remember you. Will you remember me? Don't let your life pass you by…__**weep not for the memories**__."_

Eli stroked her curls softly for a moment before he pulled her back. "You have _nothing_ to be sorry for. Come on, let's get you out of here, sweetheart." He waited until Clare nodded softly and picked her up again, walking her into the hallway. Nodding at the doctors, he watched them travel into Randall's room and gently cover his still body with the blanket. Leaving them to their duties, he kept Clare's face tucked into his shoulder while walking over to Glen and Helen.

Helen jumped up immediately. "Eli, how did you get her up?"

"I don't know." He smiled sadly, caressing Clare's back through her thin pink sweatshirt. Clare whimpered brokenly and grabbed fistfuls of his gray sweatshirt. "It's okay," he assured her, attempting to set her on her feet. Clare only stumbled over and he barely caught her before she fell, lifting her into his arms again. "Is it alright if I carry her to my car? Or would you like to just take her home? Whatever is best for Clare…?" Eli trailed off, gently stroking her back and wanting to kiss her forehead.

Helen sighed deeply, rubbing her temples, stressed to the max tonight. "It's alright with me if you want to just take her back to your place. I trust you, Eli. I know you'll take care of her." She smiled softly at him, wiping away her tears and linking her arm through Glen's. "Glen and I are just going to head on home now." Approaching Clare, she gently kissed Clare's curls and whispered, "I love you, baby," before going downstairs to the lobby.

"Clare, I'm going to take you to my place, okay? I'm sure CeCe and Bullfrog will be happy to see you." Eli wrapped her legs around his waist and effortlessly carried her down the stairs and out to his car. Passing through the lobby, many people sent them sympathetic looks. He merely kept his gaze straight ahead, focused on driving Clare home as soon as possible.

Once she was settled into the passenger seat of his car, he began driving with a mix CD of all of Clare's favorite songs on very low volume, careful not to disturb the girl. She slumped against the door, feeling the cool breeze blow gently against her porcelain skin. "You know, you don't have to do this, Eli. I'll be okay by myself tonight; I don't want to bother you anymore than I already have."

Eli glanced over at her briefly before refocusing his eyes on the road ahead of them, houses flashing by as they drove straight to Eli's house. "I'm not leaving you alone tonight, Clare. You are _not_ bothering me. You could _never._ Tonight…tonight you need to be held, sweetie. You need me, and _that's okay_, because you've _always_ been there for when _I_ needed _you_. You never left me alone, so I'm not abandoning you." Parking into his driveway, Eli slowly shut the car door behind him and settled Clare into his arms before making his way up the steps. Trying not to jostle her around too much, Eli reached into his pocket and unlocked the door.

"I just…I don't know anymore," Clare said softly as he carried her to the couch, noting that he had forgotten his parents would not be home until after they were asleep since Bullfrog was taking CeCe to a concert. _Typical,_ he thought, smirking just a tiny bit. "Eli, stop," Clare whimpered, burying her face in his soft gray sweatshirt, feeling the gentle material press up against her cheek.

Eli paused, sitting her down on the couch. "What's the matter?" he asked softly, sitting beside her and draping a supportive arm around her shoulders.

Clare jumped up suddenly, scaring him. "Eli, I have to get back to the hospital! My dad…he needs me! He needs me to take care of him. I…I-I n-need to get back there, Eli. I'm just going to go…I'll w-walk." She quickly made her way towards the door, and just as she was grasping the cold doorknob, she felt his arms wrap around her waist and bring her backwards. "NO! STOP IT! STOP!" she screamed, feeling his arms tighten around her waist gently while he tried to get her to the couch. "No," she sobbed, feeling weakness overcome her as her knees gave out on her and she slowly sank onto the floor.

Eli kept his arms around her waist tightly; keeping her steady as he slowly sank to the floor with her. She sobbed brokenly, turning around in his embrace and allowing her face to fall into his lap. Softly, he stroked her hair and picked her head up, keeping it propped against his shoulder.

"NO," she cried out, hating but loving the way he only tightened his arms around her as she completely, and utterly fell apart. She desperately tried to get up, wanting nothing more than to be with her father, for they had not enough time together. It wasn't fair. Trying to pick herself up, she was only unsuccessful when Eli took her legs and gently wrapped his own around them, restraining her from moving. "ELI, DON'T DO THIS TO ME…_daddy needs me_!" she sobbed deeply, gasping while continuing her struggles to get up.

Eli's eyes watered at the fact that he had to restrain her. Going to the hospital would only get Clare in further trouble, and her father had already been taken to the morgue. It was also starting to pour down rain outside, and he simply _couldn't_ risk _anything _happening to Clare. "Shh, easy, _easy_, Clare," he murmured in her ear with his soft, warm voice. She struggled and writhed, her body growing exhausted and just wanting to give up. However, Clare did not grant it that wish. "Shh, easy, easy," Eli kept his lips pressed against her ear as he whispered these things directly into it.

"Eli, PLEASE. Please," Clare sobbed and screamed, struggling continuously to escape his grip. Her will was smashed to pieces, however, when he began rocking her in a slow, gentle, back-and-forth motion. Surrendering to him and her sobs, Clare cried loudly and buried her face in his shoulder.

"That's it, easy, shh, _shh_, easy does it," Eli gently chanted over and over again, rocking her back and forth and keeping her legs beneath and entangled with his own. "You're not going anywhere, shhh, shh, easy, sweetheart," he made sure he wasn't hurting her and readjusted her body so her face was drawn into his chest and her legs were still beneath his. He pressed the gentlest of kisses to her forehead when she let out a particularly sharp and loud sob. "Shh, I got you," he repeated in the softest of voices, slowly kissing her temple up to her forehead.

When Clare slowly regained her composure and found some solace, she grabbed his arms. "Let's go to bed…let's sleep. We can just sleep and be together. I…need you," she looked at him with doleful eyes and her lower lip began to quiver before he gently placed his thumb over it.

"Come on," he gently untangled their legs and carried her in his arms to his room. "Do you want anything to eat, sweetie?" he asked fervently after he had given her some sweatpants and a shirt to change into.

Clare shrugged. "I think I'm okay. I had some lunch earlier, so I think I'm alright." She curled into a ball on his mattress after changing. "Some tea would be nice, though." She added gently, and he approached her tenderly. "What?" she whispered, blushing slightly at the tears running down her face.

"You're just so beautiful. You have no idea." He smiled, dropping a kiss on her forehead before running his hands down her arms soothingly and running downstairs to retrieve her tea.

When he finally came back, he found Clare gazing out the windowpane, probably staring into the rain and wondering where it all went wrong. "Clare," he said, wishing she'd turn around. "I have your tea. I put one teaspoon of honey in it, just like you like it."

Clare's shoulders trembled slightly as she pressed both palms against the glass. "There's no sense in getting attached, is there?"

"Hmm?" he murmured, coming up behind her and snaking his arms around her waist as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

Clare sighed shakily. "There's no sense in getting attached to you. Something bad will happen, and I'll lose you."

"Oh, Clare, I'm not going anywhere. I don't plan on leaving you any time soon. Don't worry. You've just lost your father tonight, love. I know you're scared to love right now, but if there's anything I learned, it's that taking a risk when it comes to love is very important." Eli gently kissed her shoulder and buried his nose in her neck, slowly pulling her backwards towards the bed. "Sip your tea," he whispered, curling up behind her and rubbing her back gently.

After her tea was downed rather quickly, the warmth flooding through her stomach was causing Clare to become extremely drowsy, and she felt Eli turning out the light and inviting her under the covers. When she was under, she felt a body press up against her back and arms slowly making their way around her stomach. Smiling ever so slightly through her tears, Clare blinked the tears back and sighed into his gentle touch. He pressed his soft lips to her temple several times, and he even kissed down to where her shoulder and neck met and nuzzled it with his nose for comfort.

They talked for several minutes, maybe even hours. Clare couldn't remember. The last thing she felt was Eli's kisses traveling to her cheek in the darkness.

Eli couldn't sleep. He didn't _want _to. Every so often, he would drift off out of pure exhaustion for about an hour or so, only to wake up in a panic to make sure Clare was alright. Luckily so, she was sleeping soundly, her heart broken and smashed, and he pressed kisses into her curls that would cause a slow smile to curl onto her face.

_"I love you, and I'll be here when you wake up in the morning." _


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8…

It had been exactly two days since the passing of Randall Edwards. Clare had been crying for a minimum of twenty minutes each night, not counting the night-long sobbing she had done in Eli's arms the night of her father's death. Now, Clare sat perched on her bed, flipping through an old, tattered scrapbook in which ancient pictures of she and her family were contained. Flipping the page, unsmiling, Clare stared at the following photo. In it was her, Darcy, Helen, and Randall at the beach, the very last memory she had reminded Randall of before he closed his eyes permanently.

A knock at the door startled her into slamming the aged book shut and inserting it under her bed. Sitting up straight, she coughed once before answering with, "Come in,"

Helen entered the room with a small smile on her face, gently shutting the door behind her. Her hands were lightly rubbing her now slightly noticeable baby bump, but her face instantly fell when she noticed her daughter sitting cross-legged on her bed, sporting a melancholy state. "Hi, sweetie," she carefully approached Clare's still form, taking a seat on the bed beside her. "I know today is going to be so hard for you. Is Eli on his way, honey?" Helen laid her hand on Clare's jean-clad thigh, feeling it shaking slightly. When Clare did not answer right away, she became worried, leaning a little closer to her daughter's face. "Clare?"

"What? Oh, yeah, Eli's coming." She replied shortly, shaking her head in an attempt to rid herself of the terrified thoughts swarming through it. Laying her head on her mother's shoulder, she sighed deeply before lamenting, "I just don't know how to do this."

Helen frowned and lightly touched Clare's hand, resting her head atop hers. "I know, baby. I know. You won't be alone, though, okay? Eli and the rest of the family will be there for you, Clare. We're all going to pull through this _together._" Trying to reassure her daughter, Helen softly caressed Clare's damp cheek and brushed the tears away. "Baby girl, I'm so sorry. I know how much you loved him." Clare nodded, her curls tickling Helen's neck as her head was nestled in the crook of Helen's neck. "Oh Clare, honey, you don't even know how strong you really are." Gently rubbing Clare's back after wrapping her thin arms around her, Clare's mother knew Clare never resisted a good cry this way.

"Mommy, you know I'm sorry. I'm really sorry!" she whimpered, her tears splashing into the shoulder strap of Helen's black dress. "I didn't mean to disappoint you." Clare limply cried in her mother's warm embrace, inhaling the sweet-smelling perfume Helen had on for the occasion.

Helen patted Clare's curls down, gingerly placing kisses in them. "Honey, we all make mistakes, some worse than others, but it is all part of a learning experience. Yes, I am disappointed in your actions concerning Jake, but you're only sixteen years old, Clare. Everything is confusing right now, and I now see that the divorce only increased that confusion. I should have been there for you during the divorce, but I was too preoccupied by my own heartbreak." Holding Clare tightly, Helen ran her hands up and down Clare's gray tank top comfortingly. The circles she rubbed into her daughter's back only caused Clare to cry more. "Clare, I'm very sorry I wasn't there to guide you through such a loss at the time. You're so strong, sweetheart. I know you can be strong and get through this; I believe in you, baby." Helen softly caressed Clare's back, and Clare shivered at the soft touches.

Clare sniffled and laid her head on her mom's shoulder once more; clutching her mother's back and careful not to wet the material. "O-okay," she stated softly. "I-I'm ready, Mom," she pulled back slightly and placed a kiss on her mom's cheek.

"Clare, Eli is here!" Glen called from downstairs, and Helen cast a teasing smile at her daughter, whose cheeks burned with a slight blush before she eagerly got off the bed and ran downstairs. Remaining on her daughter's bed, Helen silently thanked God for having Eli serve as Clare's angel.

Dashing down the hall, Clare passed Jake, who looked extremely bewildered, as if he had just woken up from a nap. "Clare?" he asked confusedly, rubbing his head gently.

Clare stopped her sprint and turned around to face him. "What is it, Jake?"

"I just wanted to apologize; I never should have used you in such a horrible way. I just…just…I hope you're okay." He flashed a sympathetic smile and straightened his tie. Smoothing his hands down his black tuxedo, he looked down at the ground, rocking back and forth on his feet.

Clare's eyes widened slightly, since she had not expected to hear this. "Thank you, Jake. I think we're both at fault here, not just you. We're family though, so we've got to stick together." She smiled forgivingly, but quickly remembered Eli was waiting for her downstairs. "Eli's here," she murmured, turning on her sock-clad foot and running down the stairs.

"Of course I love her-"Eli was just finishing a sentence when Clare entered the living room. Blushing madly, he coughed and straightened his black suit, nodding at Glen.

Glen turned around, only to see a shy-looking Clare leaning against the staircase. "Oh, uh, hi, Clare. I'm just going to…find your mom and uh…get ready." He stood up and gave her shoulder a quick squeeze before running up the stairs to him and his wife's room.

"Well, that was awkward, now wasn't it?" Eli smirked, trying to break the ice. When he noticed Clare's thin frame slumped against the wall, clad in a light gray tank top, dark jeans, and purple socks, he stood up. Meeting her gaze with burning compassion in his deep greens, Eli slowly approached his girlfriend and wrapped his arms around her waist slowly and tightly. He squeezed gently, crossing his arms behind her back to keep her as close to him as possible. "How have you been?" he murmured in her ear, kissing her neck quickly and burying his face in her shoulder.

Clare returned the hug gladly, looping her arms around his neck and squeezing sprightly. "Hanging on," she offered, feeling his lips on her shoulder. His soft lips kissed and pressed to where her neck met her shoulder in attempt to wipe away any fear that still lingered inside of her. "Eli-"she began, but she just couldn't find the words to say it.

"I know." He simply replied in a husky voice, tears springing at his eyes. Slowly and softly, Eli ran his hands all over Clare's back, rubbing it in gentle motions. He kissed her shoulder once more, feeling her silky skin against his lips and tightening his arms around her.

"I'm scared." She whispered in the meekest of voices, clinging back onto him for dear life.

Eli shook his head slowly, his dark brown locks brushing against her shoulder. "I'll be there the entire time." He promised, swearing his own life upon it while slowly calming down her tense muscles by massaging the tension out of her back. Once her shaking subsided and her body began to feel more normal, he slowly pulled out of their hug. "You should get ready." He smiled gently, taking in her disheveled appearance.

"Okay. I just need to get into my dress and heels." Clare muttered, beginning to walk away before she felt Eli tugging gently at her wrist, bringing her back towards him. "What is it?" she asked kindly, tilting her head to the side in confusion.

Eli said nothing. Instead, he leaned forward, cupping her cheek, and leaned down towards her face angled towards his. Smirking sweetly while lightly rubbing his thumbs over Clare's flushed cheek, Eli caused Clare's heart to skip a beat or two as he leaned all the way down, letting his eyelids close softly just before pressing his lips to hers. He kissed her gently and tenderly, caressing her cheek the entire time.

Clare just about melted at his soft, sweet, and plump pink lips pressing against hers in this comfortable way. Not wanting him to pull away, she finally smiled when he did. "I'll go now," she stated softly, much more calm at this point. Hopping up the steps, Clare flashed Eli a gentle, sincere smile that warmed his heart.

As she got changed, Eli waited for her patiently on the couch. _I'm going to have to finish that conversation with Glen, _he thought. _Why didn't I ask Randall while I had the chance? I should have asked him. Glen cares about Clare though, so I suppose he'll do. I should ask Helen, too. Damn it, Eli! You should've asked her father! _He mentally slapped himself for not doing so as he stared down at his black slacks and black shoes. Eli, however, was startled out of his thought process when he felt Clare gingerly take a seat next to him on the couch.

"Hi," she whispered, kissing his cheek.

Eli grinned, turning to see her in a just-above-the-knee length black dress and black heels. Her cinnamon hair was curled to perfection and she sported light, natural-looking makeup. "You look so beautiful, sweetheart." He wrapped his arm around her as they waited for Helen, Glen, and Jake to come downstairs.

"Thanks," she said, kissing his cheek once more. Clare was pleasantly surprised when she felt him repeat the action to her. Snuggling in closer to his side, Clare felt safe and secure.

The couple sat up straight as Helen, Glen, and Jake entered the room. "Hello, Mrs. Martin. Jake," Eli smiled pleasantly at Helen and did his best to be civil to Jake.

"Hello, Eli. Come on, you two. We've got to get this over with." Helen and Glen walked briskly out to the car, leaving Jake to trail after them.

Standing up slowly, Eli offered his hand to Clare, who was still nervous as anything to attend her father's funeral. "Shall we?" he asked sweetly, glad that she accepted his hand and walking out the door with his love by his side.

The church was packed. Various cousins, aunts, uncles, and family friends were present, some more tearful than others. Randall's mother, Grandma Edwards, was quite happy to see Clare, and Randall's father was beside her faithfully. Eli stood by respectfully and introduced himself to much of Clare's family, as did Jake and Glen. As Clare accepted many hugs from her father's siblings and their children, she eyed Eli nervously, earning a reassuring tiny smile back from him.

When she saw Randall's body in the casket, Clare had a hard time not feeling sick inside. Indeed, she actually _did_ feel sick inside. It was so painful, not being able to hug or talk to her father. Many family members and friends said kind words at the small podium, telling stories of Randall in their lifetimes and getting choked up over anecdotes of the good times.

During her Cousin Molly's speech, Clare began to realize that she would be going next. If anything made her nervous, it was this. She coughed lightly and felt tears sting her eyes. Her vision became extremely blurred, and it was only so much time that she began to feel overwhelmed and terrified. "Eli," she murmured desperately, seeking help.

"Hey," Eli whispered in her ear, reaching for her hand that was balled up into a tight fist. His fingers gently uncurled her clenched fingers and opened them, sliding his own between them to create an interlaced promise. "Clare, I need you to be strong." He whispered in her ear, feeling her shake involuntarily.

Clare's heart pounded in fear as her cousin began to wrap up her speech. "I'm scared, Eli." She shuddered slightly, her eyes wide with fear.

Eli brought his lips very close to her ear, gently bringing her hand to rest on his thigh, intertwined with his own. "You're my strong girl, Clare. Just be my strong, brave girl for twenty more minutes, and then we can get out of here." He promised her this in his low undertone, gently nudging Clare towards the church's altar.

"O-okay." She stood up, legs shaking, but Eli's encouraging smile gave her the strength to speak. As she finally reached the altar, feeling all eyes on her, Clare spoke into the microphone, "Hi, everybody. Thank you so much for coming to my dad's funeral; I know this would mean a lot to him, having you all here like this." She began, peering down to find Eli in the front row right next to an uncomfortable looking Jake and a calm Helen and Glen. "To start, I would like you all to know that from the very start when I was a little girl, my dad has been my hero. He, along with my mother, taught me right from wrong, taught me to tell time, and taught me Christian values that I use in everyday life. My sister, Darcy, and I used to spend a lot time with him growing up. I wish she could be here right now, actually." Clare took a short pause to take a glance at her father's casket, where a bouquet of flowers rest atop of it, and picked at the hem of her dress. "My dad is my hero; I haven't had the best relationship with him lately, but I'll always love him. I guess what I'm trying to say is…never take family for granted. You never know when it could be someone's last day. Thank you." Clare brushed her tears away, only having them replaced by new ones. Quickly walking down the altar to the aisle, Clare and her mom exchanged an understanding glance, and Clare ran down the aisle to the church door, leading to the outside courtyard.

She sat down on the stone steps and buried her face in her lap, beginning to weep softly. Her cries became more pronounced, however, when she felt herself being pulled into a pair of strong arms. "Oh, gosh," Clare cried, choking slightly on her second word.

"Shh, good job, good job, Clare," Eli gently praised her for gathering her strength in the church to deliver the short speech. His hands caressed her bare shoulders as she sobbed her heart out. "Atta girl, atta girl," he muttered over and over again, placing his hands on her back and holding her close to him when she turned her small body into his, weeping gently. "So proud of you, sweetheart," he said softly, repeatedly kissing her forehead and holding her close. "You're my little strong angel," Eli praised her, "You can cry, that's alright. You did so well, love."

Clare timidly raised her head from his suit-clad chest and looked up at him, her blue eyes shining behind the tears. "I didn't even…get to finish. I had more to say, but I just couldn't."

"I know. You did very well, Clare. You tried your best, and I am so proud of you." Gently slipping his arms below her underarms and hugging her swiftly, Eli whispered in her ear, "You're my strong girl, Clare. You are my strong, brave, fearless girl. You're my girl…"

Clare smiled softly, feeling herself begin to be rocked from side-to-side gently. "Can we go somewhere?"

Eli nodded immediately. "I want to take you somewhere special; I just asked your mom and she said it was okay. Come on, sweetie." Standing up, he held his hand out to her and interlaced their fingers, leading her down the winding path to his car.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9…

"Come on, just a few steps further!" Eli whispered excitedly to Clare, keeping her hand in his as he led her to their destination. She was blindfolded, slowly following the sound of his voice. They had stopped after the funeral to buy some clothes to change into- Eli had grown uncomfortable in his tuxedo whereas Clare could not stand another moment in her black dress.

Clare smiled when she felt her feet come in contact with warm, soft sand. The brown leather flip flops Eli had bought her directly after the funeral felt comfortable on her worn out feet. He had also bought her a comfortable, loose-fitting purple shirt and a soft, flowery skirt. Eli had also purchased a cute red headband to lighten her mood that kept her blowing curls in place. "Eli, can I _please_ take off the blindfold now?" she begged, tugging at his hand.

Smirking softly, Eli slowly approached her and kissed her forehead. He slowly slid off the black mesh blindfold and whispered, "Open your eyes, Clare."

Clare gasped, taking in the brilliant sight before her. The thick Canadian wilderness was behind them, lush green deciduous trees and blossoming cherry trees weaving about the soil and sand path. The warm, salty beach air clashed gently with the rolling beach waves that crashed tentatively against the wooden dock. A small house was spotted by Clare, perched on a high and grassy hill across the beach. "Eli, this is amazing," she exclaimed, eagerly stepping onto the beach and spying the steps leading to the dock.

Eli laughed as his girl climbed onto the dock, following her suit. His own black leather flip flops lightly slapped against the dock as Clare giggled softly and gazed out, feeling the sea breeze tickle her face. He slowly lowered himself onto the sun-warmed wood next to her, smiling widely. "I'm really glad you let me bring you here." He spoke softly.

"I'm really happy I came, too, Eli." Clare replied, reaching her hand out to him. She blushed crimson when he gently slid his fingers between hers and rested their interlaced hands on the warm dock. "This is nice, like a dream, but…" she trailed off sadly, turning her face out to the sunset.

Eli nodded solemnly. "I know." He squeezed her hand in support as the warm air settled in around them and the nearby brook bubbled. The trees swayed gently in the wind when he noticed tears well up in her eyes. "Hey," he sighed, placing his free hand on Clare's shoulder lightly.

Clare laughed through her tears and turned to face Eli. Her eyes closed when his fingers made contact with her cheek and brushed her tears away. "I still don't believe it; he's really gone. How am I supposed to move on from this?" she asked him.

Surprised, he ripped his eyes from the beginning sunset and looked her in the eyes. She turned to look at him directly, her blues clashing with his greens. "You will, Clare. Look, I know how it feels to lose someone special to you. Sometimes, it helps if you find a visible reminder of that person. Like…with Julia, I look at the stars, and I know she's there." He explained, and he smirked playfully when he saw her adorable confused cock of the head. "Come on, sweetie," he pulled her to the stairs leading to the sand.

"What is it?" Clare questioned, but she gasped when she saw the brilliant orange and pink sunset painted above the dark water.

"There he is, Clare. That's your dad…and I know he's proud of you. I know he loves you." He said seriously, the sun creating a shade of brilliant tan on his soft, slightly freckled cheek.

Clasping her hands over her mouth in awe at the sun's natural beauty, Clare was overwhelmed with the feeling of being truly loved for the first time in so long. Then, it hit her. Eli Goldsworthy was always there. He had never left her life. Having given up her virginity to Jake, she wanted nothing more than to take it back and save it for the boy who really deserved it. Landing her eyes on Eli, Clare realized how…perfect…the moment was. If Jake didn't stay after she shared herself with him, surely Eli would. She smiled at him, playing with her skirt, a plan brewing in her mind. She wanted to feel. She wanted to feel cared for, physically. Eli was so nice to take her here and support her emotionally, but she couldn't limit herself to just that. She wanted to feel him, his heart and soul not only, but his body of strength and hope. She wanted to feel his breathing in her ear, coming in soft pants, and feel his soft skin on hers. She wanted to feel his lips on her neck, chest, and kissing her deeply. She wanted to run her fingernails down his sun-kissed back and hug him tightly to her as they moved to their own rhythm. She wanted the moment to be long and slow his pants and strangled sweet nothings to reverberate in her ears. She wanted to kiss his face all over and hear his gentle, deep moans in her ear as he gently moved within her. She wanted to scream his name as he cared for her body with every aspect of his ability; she just wanted to feel him. She wanted to run her fingers through his silky locks, as they lay on the beach, sweaty and in a tangled heap of limbs. She wanted his heart, soul, and body. If only…

Eli, having no idea what was coming, returned her smile as the gentle water lapped at their feet. He sweetly leaned down and kissed her lips softly, pressing his soft lips against hers and opening his mouth only slightly. She returned the kiss, bringing her arms around his neck and moaning quietly. Only too soon did he separate their lips, not wanting to ruin any boundaries?

Clare grabbed his hand and yanked him forcefully to the ground a few feet away from them. Eli, confused, pinned his eyebrows together and sat stone still as Clare climbed on top of him. She leaned in and pressed her entire body against his, kissing his plump pink lips. "I want you," she moaned against his lips, pushing him to lie down.

Eli, caught off guard, moaned softly but stopped himself as he realized just where this was about to be headed. "No, Clare," He breathed, not wanting to hurt or startle her. "No," he said quietly, but trailed off and began to lose strength as her lips began a trail of kisses down his exposed neck. She gently kissed his chest above his white V-neck all the way down to his stomach before gently sliding her warm hands underneath the material.

Eli's eyes remained closed, too lost in the moment to realize what Clare was doing. He moaned softly once more when he felt her soft, feeble hands pull his shirt up, exposing his bare stomach to the sun. "Oh, Clare," he staggered, his hands trying to grip hers and stop her as she smiled and kissed his bare skin. The sun beat down on them, sweat beginning to sheathe on Eli's forehead. "Oh," he groaned when he saw Clare smile gently up at him, starting her trail of kisses with every pull of his shirt.

Clare pulled his shirt over his head and threw it in the sand a few feet away from them. She smiled when she saw Eli's chest for the first time before kissing every inch of his chest. Her lips created contrails of love up to his neck. Clare lightly stroked his cheek as she kissed it, trailing back down to care for his neck once again. "Hm, Eli," she sighed blissfully, pressing her lips to different parts of his neck repeatedly.

Eli, far gone, was struggling to fight his eyelids, for they kept fluttering shut every time he tried to open them. He could not think as the girl he loved unconditionally kissed his neck with the lips of an angel. "Clare," he started.

"Shh," she whispered in his ear, her curls covering his cheek as he inhaled the scent of strawberry within them. "I want you, Eli, and I know you want me, so shh," Clare caressed his warm cheek and made her kisses eastward toward his mouth. Kissing the corner of his lips, she murmured, "Just let me thank you,"

Eli, about to speak, was engulfed by Clare's lips against his right as he was opening his mouth to voice his question. As their lips locked and relocked, Eli whispered in between urgent kisses, "For what? Thank…me…for what?"

"Shhh, for always being here…you're…the only…one." Clare gasped, her tongue making its way into his mouth and playing with his own. "Hmm," she smiled when she felt his overall warmth, trailing her hands down his chest to his arms and rubbing them gently. "I love you," she said truthfully, kissing him urgently.

Eli's eyes opened slowly when he felt the realization hit him. "Come on, Clare," he said desperately to no avail. Clare's lips remained on his as she muttered, "Shh, Eli,"

"No," he tried to get out as her hands traveled down to his lower region. She smiled confusedly, kissing down to his shorts and attempting to tug them down. Everything felt so unreal and amazing that Eli couldn't be sure if it was really happening; his eyes were the only thing assuring him that it was. "No, no," he gasped out, sitting up eagerly and grabbing his shirt to pull it on.

Clare pulled back, extremely disheveled and startled. "Why?"

Shaking his head to gather his thoughts correctly, Eli reached his arms out to her and pulled her onto his lap, leaning against a wooden wall protecting a sand dune behind them.

Reluctantly, Clare settled onto his lap, feeling his embrace around her waist. "Why, Eli? Just let me love you."

Eli sighed shakily. "Clare, we're not going to do that. I don't want to just have sex with you; _I want to make love to you._ You're only doing this because of Jake! You need to know that I will never leave you. Jake and I are the complete opposite when it comes to that. Do you know how much I love? What I'd do for you?"

"You've already done so much." She cried, recalling the memories, painful and bad.

"Exactly," he began, kissing her head gently. "Sweetheart, I need you to understand something. You won't be making love to me when we share that for the first time; _we will be making love to each other. _I do not expect you to bend any rules or boundaries for my sake. I don't need you to. Please, just be yourself, Clare, because there is no one better." He asserted with finality, hugging her sweetly.

Clare sighed sadly. "I'm so sorry, Eli. I didn't mean to put you in a bad situation. I love you, and I just wanted to show you how much."

"You do. Each and every day." Eli smiled, hugging her gently to him and tangling his legs with hers.

Clare turned around in his embrace. "That doesn't mean we can't do anything. Eli, we hardly ever even kiss. I need more of you," she giggled, threading her fingers through his dark hair.

"I need you, too, Clare. I need you, too." With that, Eli slowly leaned his forehead onto hers. Their skin brushed and so did their noses, making eye contact the entire time. He kept his eyes on hers before gently pressing his lips to hers. "It's going to be okay," he promised before kissing her gently, falling into the sand with her right where she should be: in his arms.

Two hours later, Clare was safely sleeping in bed with Eli cuddled in beside her. Helen, Glen, and Jake had gone up to the cabin, the last place Clare wanted to be. Clare had begged Eli to stay with her even though he was trying to convince her to just get some rest. Eli slowly stroked her arm, his arm around her shoulders. "You're my yellow star," he smiled, kissing her forehead as she cuddled into him deeper. "Sweetheart," he sighed, falling asleep to the sound of her gentle breathing.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10…

Two months later, Clare was still very much the same. Her deepest regrets about Randall still haunted her, though not quite as often, and Eli was with her every step of the way. Eli visited Clare's house quite often to help Clare with homework, as well as to assist with a very pregnant Helen. Helen was towards the end of the sixth month of her pregnancy, and Eli had come to the Edwards-Martin household to help as much as he could whenever Glen was out of town on contracting trips.

May 18th, however, was a different day. Eli's graduation was scheduled for 8:00PM by the Degrassi front steps. It was…monumental.

"Clare, where is Jake?" Helen asked, stressing out as she walked briskly down the hallway, getting ready for Eli's graduation. Her temples throbbed, and she was beyond stressed that her stepson's whereabouts were unknown. Glen was out of town once again, and having Eli coming over earlier in the day to help her was beyond sweet. She ran a hand through her brunette hair and checked her watch, which read 7:15PM.

Clare quickly dropped the book she had been reading while propped up in bed and jumped up. Running over to her mother, she gently placed a hand on Helen's shoulder and guided her into her and Glen's bedroom. Once Helen was firmly seated on the bed, Clare stood in front of her and smiled. "Mom, take it easy, okay? Jake won't be coming with us tonight. He's got plans with Jenna." She rolled her eyes to herself, but having matured very much since her and Jake's relationship, she had grown minimally happy for the couple. Jenna and Jake had been dating for a considerable amount of time, ever since he had cheated on Clare with her. Jake seemed happy with Jenna, and even though their "sibling" relationship was indefinitely strained and uncomfortable at the moment, Clare and Jake had been truly trying to improve things in the household they shared.

"I wish he had let me know that. Goodness, I can't stand rushing around and worrying like this. I've been stressed ever since…Randall's death, and I miss Glen, and I feel _so guilty_ making Eli do all of those _nice things_ for me. That boy really is a sweetheart, Clare. He's a keeper, and he _really_ loves you." Helen gently placed her hand on Clare's and motioned for her to sit beside her on the king sized bed.

Slowly sinking down onto the sheets, Clare crossed her legs and leaned her chin on her elbow to face her mother. "Before you say anything mom, you should know that you didn't _make _Eli do anything for you. He saw that you were struggling with cleaning and the dishes and moving around, and he wanted to help. That's…what Eli does, mom. He…he helps people, even people who don't deserve it. You deserve it, mom." She laughed softly and glanced down at her hand still entwined with Helen's.

Helen sighed and finally looked up from her protruding belly and lifted her gaze to meet her daughter's beautiful blue eyes. Gently untangling her hand from Clare's and using it to run her hand through the gorgeous, soft, bouncy curls, she began her monologue. "Clare, there are…different types of boys in the world. Many, _many_ different types." Clare nodded at the establishment of this fact, signaling that she indeed understood that now. "There aren't many boys like Eli in the world. You won't find many Eli-type boys, but you can find about a million Jake-type boys. Of course I love Jake; he is m stepson. Regardless, he is not the type of boy you need right now."

"Mom, I know tha-," Clare began, but her mother put her hand up to stop her. She nodded and closed her mouth, fixing her gaze on her mother's tired brown eyes.

"Honey, you _don't_ know. I married your father, and little did I know that several years later, when our eldest daughter was all grown up, and our youngest daughter was in the midst of growing up, that I would find out he was not the man for me _at all._" She fixed her gaze on her daughter piercingly, seriously scanning her innocent face. She frowned and brought her hand up to cup and stroke Clare's soft cheek. "Sweetheart, you don't see what's right in front of you. I know Eli has been here for you for _so long_…but you need to be here for him, too. Relationships are about give and take, to care for and be cared for. Learn from _my_ mistake, Clare. Your father wasn't who I thought he was, just as Jake was not what you believed _he _was." She gently slid some curls behind Clare's left ear before kissing her forehead softly.

Clare frowned, tears pricking at her eyes. "Mommy," she sighed, hanging her head low, her shoulders shaking lightly.

"Clare," Helen gently leaned Clare's head on her shoulder and stroked her hair. "I am not angry with you for having sex with Jake. You were very confused and lonely at the time. It kills me that I didn't look out for you better."

Clare turned her cheek into the crook of her mother's shoulder, inhaling the floral perfume she loved so much. A single tear made its way out of the corner of her eye. "I know you're disappointed in me, mom. I'm disappointed in me, too. I wish I could just take it back. Mom…_I know _how much Eli cares for me. It's become pretty blatant to me; Mom, I-I…I wish he could've been my first," she whimpered, feeling Helen's fold in between hers once again. Suddenly, she felt her hand being laid on Helen's stomach. She gasped when she felt a light kick against her stomach. "Mom?"

Helen giggled lightly, trying to lighten the mood. "That's your baby brother or sister in there, Clare. I want you to be the best big sister you can be. If it's a girl…I want you to look after her. Teach her, guide her, and be a good sister so she will not make the same mistake you did. You can do it, Clare. You'll be a wonderful big sister." She smiled gently and moved Clare's hand off her stomach.

"I will, mom," Clare promised, wiping her lagging tears away and laughing gingerly. "I guess we should get ready, it's 7:30! Eli's graduation is at 8!" With that, she blushed at just the mention of Eli's name and hopped off to her room.

Helen giggled at Clare's giddiness to see Eli. _Honestly, _she thought leaning over to grab her shoes and dress, _this boy is perfect for my little girl. _

**8:00PM, Degrassi Community School front steps. **

The warm, slightly humid May air floated around Clare, who was perched on one of the many folding chairs next to her mother. Helen smiled up at the stage, where Eli was seated a few seats away from Imogen. Fiona smiled and waved at Clare, and Clare returned the friendly wave. The atmosphere was peaceful; everything was in place. Eli's parents sat next to Clare, and though she had met with them about a month ago when she and Eli had finally told them about their relationship, Clare blushed and tentatively sat beside CeCe. CeCe smiled and patted Clare's hand, whispering, "It's okay, baby girl. We're happy you're here."

On stage, Eli searched the crowd for Clare. When his eyes finally found her, he gasped and gripped his shiny blue graduation gown due to Clare's…_beauty. _The small girl was clad in a white sundress with a pink sash at the waist, gold sandals, and a few bangles on her left wrist from Helen and a light pink headband in her gorgeously wild curls. He gently waved at her and flashed an adorable loving, toothy smile. Clare blushed madly and waved, smiling widely back at him. Helen bumped her arm at the same time as CeCe and both ladies giggled. Bullfrog rolled his eyes, snickering to himself.

"Good evening, parents, family, and friends of the 2012 Degrassi Community School graduates. Firstly, I would like to thank you all for attending this important event." Mr. Simpson began speaking at the podium at the center of the stage. Bees buzzed and the gentle stars shined down upon the 2012 class. A few parents were already crying, and CeCe was tearing up a bit, earning a side hug from Clare. Mr. Simpson cleared his throat and continued, "Our seniors have worked incredibly hard this school year, and I could not be more proud and honored to announce Degrassi's Class Of 2012!" The crowd burst into applause immediately, and the graduates sat proudly on the stage, smiling down upon their parents, siblings, family, and friends. The principal waited for order to be restored before leaning back down to the microphone. "I would like to begin with our 2012 Valedictorian, Katie Matlin," On stage about five seats down from Marisol, Katie blushed as her mother, father, and Maya screamed, "We love you, Katie!" Mr. Simpson smiled and gestured Katie over to the podium as the audience exploded into applause.

After about thirty seconds, the applause finally began to die down. Katie smiled around at the crowd, this being the moment she had dreamed of since she was a little girl. She had worked so hard over the years, and now it was finally paying off. Her long, light red hair swayed in the breeze slightly as she began her speech. "Today is the day that most students eagerly await; today is also the day some students dread. Graduation means growing up, and going out into the world. It's exciting, but it's also really scary. You're leaving everything you've ever known." Katie took a breath, trying to calm her slightly buzzing nerves as the sun shone down on her delicately.

Meanwhile, Eli gazed at Clare, her presence being the only thing calming his nerves. He was going to be awarded an Honors diploma, a rather big achievement that he was certain a lot of people would have liked to have gained. Eli also did not particularly enjoy being on stage in front of many people ever since his breakdown during Love Roulette. However, his fears vanished as soon as he saw Clare's aqua blue eyes staring lovingly straight up at him.

"When I first came to Degrassi my Grade 11 year, I wasn't sure of what kind of school it would be. I was nervous, afraid, and full of self-doubt. I wasn't really sure how I would succeed at my new school. What I've come to learn, though, is that you have to be fearless. You have to let go of your inhibitions and just _go for it._" Katie smiled and looked directly at her parents. "I would like to thank my parents, as well as my little sister, Maya." Her family waved at her and smiled wide. Turning her gaze to Mr. Simpson, Katie grinned, stating, "On behalf of the Class Of 2012, I would also like to thank Mr. Simpson, a truly knowledgeable and fair principal." Mr. Simpson blushed madly. Katie redirected her stare into the crowd. "The key truly is to be fearless, and work hard, because giving up won't get you anywhere. Thank you, Degrassi Class Of twenty-twelve!" Nodding her head at her applauding audience, Katie gently stepped down from the podium and received the diploma Mr. Simpson had been holding out for her. He slipped her tassel over her cap and motioned her down the stage and to the front steps.

Mr. Simpson regained his position at the podium. "Lauren Adams," he began calling names, and one by one, the graduates were handed their diplomas and their tassels were flipped. By now, the front steps were about halfway filled with students in bright blue gowns. Pictures snapped and tears were shed.

Eli realized his name was coming up and immediately tensed up. CeCe and Bullfrog held one another's hands tightly and Clare sat on the very edge of her seat, earning an extremely amused look from Helen.

"Eli Goldsworthy," Mr. Simpson called, and Eli slowly stood up to the sound of many people's applause.

Clare cheered for Eli, tears streaming down her face. It was a good thing she wore water-proof mascara! CeCe burst into tears of joy and threw her arms around Bullfrog, who yelled, "Yeah, way to go, brat!" Clare giggled and screamed for Eli happily, and her mother applauded gently. Helen smiled and pulled Clare into her arms, settling her daughter's frazzled head onto her shoulder. Clare giggled, hysterically happy for Eli. _He had made it so far. _

On stage, Eli smiled genuinely as he accepted his Honors diploma and made his way towards the steps. The hysterical tears of joy Clare and his mother shed brought tears to his own eyes: _never in his life had he loved people so much. _

About fifteen minutes later, the remaining graduates were called, and most of the students had shuffled off with their parents for the dinner part of the celebration. They had thrown their tassels into the air and cheered for the hard work they had done to get to where they were. Almost immediately, Clare ran to Eli after jumping up from her chair.

Eli saw Clare darting towards him in the grass, looking rather funny as she slightly stumbled in her heels. Eli's eyes widened as she clumsily tripped and fell right into his arms. Swinging her upwards, urgently asked, "Are you oka-?" …but he was cut off by Clare smashing her lips to his. He smirked into the kiss, bringing his hands around her waist and gently massaging her lower back while her arms were tightly snaked around his neck. They only broke apart when the three parents approached them and Bullfrog coughed, "PDA alert,"

Clare blushed but remained in her boyfriend's arms, feeling the folded diploma brushing against her side. Eli murmured, "You look so beautiful." into her ear, earning a blood red blush from Clare. He gently grasped Clare's hand, not intertwining their fingers, but just to help lead her to the table. He didn't want any sly remarks from his dad, though they were bound to come.

Bullfrog punched Eli on the shoulder as they were walking through the freshly cut grass of the edge of the football field. "So," he gruffly remarked into his son's ear, "You finally made it, you little brat."

Eli smirked as Clare giggled at the not-so-endearing nickname. "Well, dad, it wasn't easy. At least I'm graduating with a girlfriend." He shot back, referring to the time his dad explained to him that he had been single throughout most of high school, and that he hadn't met CeCe until college.

"Oh, you'll pay for that one, boy," Bullfrog muttered as CeCe and Helen chatted happily, having already sat down at their reserved table. "Looks like CeCe and Helen are hitting it off," he joked.

Eli rolled his eyes and pulled out Clare's chair for her, seating her between him and his dad. As the sweet spring breeze swirled around them, Eli looked at Clare from the corner of his eyes, seeing her tiny hand reaching for his under the table. Trying to be sly about it, Eli kept his eyes on his chatting mother and Clare's mom, as he gently slipped his fingers in between Clare's. Their fingers folded together perfectly, but Bullfrog spotted this move and chuckled to himself, earning a glare from Eli.

Clare smiled, feeling the happiest she had been in weeks. As the two families ate and talked throughout the night, she occasionally played with Eli's fingers which were locked in her own. She would slowly place her fork down as she listened to the sound of her mother's gentle, pleasant voice and move her hand under the table. Eli wouldn't even know it, but Clare would tenderly curl her fingers around his, stroke his wrist, and caress the back of his hand with her thumb. She was just _so proud…so honored…so lucky…to have this boy. _

Eli, however, paid his own attention to Clare. He played with the flowy edge of Clare's sundress, squeezed her hand, and gave her endearing side looks, which she blushed crimson at.

"Well, Clare, we should probably head out." Helen smiled, not even wanting to part from CeCe, who she had made instant friends with. Though the two women were practically opposites, they bonded and they gushed and giggled over Helen's growing baby belly. It was nice to have a new friend in her life, Helen decided.

Clare and Eli broke apart from their quiet conversation, and frowned immediately. "Do we have to?" Clare whined, refusing to let go of Eli's hand.

Helen sighed. "Glen and Jake are back home, and I need to get back to them. Come on, Clare," she sighed deeply, exhausted from the long night. It was almost 10:30PM, but since everyone was having such an amazing time, no one noticed it.

"O-Okay," Clare accepted, defeated and not wanting to upset her mom. She slowly let go of Eli's hand and stood up. Giving him one last kiss on the cheek, she bid the Goldsworthy's a goodbye and made her way out of the area after Helen and CeCe had a long goodbye hug.

Eli frowned as he watched her go, and about ten minutes later, he left as well.

**One Hour Later… **

Clare's cell phone lay by her hand as she fidgeted with her blanket. Having said goodnight to her mother and gone straight to bed after showering, Clare realized it was almost midnight. She already missed Eli.

Her phone was grabbed by her hand instantly. She slowly composed a text message to Eli:

Eli, I need to see you. –Clare

Exactly thirty seconds later, Clare's phone buzzed with a new message:

I'll meet you at the street corner in ten minutes. How does a camp-out sound?

Squealing, Clare immediately ran to the bathroom, primping a few more minutes before slowly creeping downstairs. At the bottom of the steps, she slowly peered around at the living room…no one was there, good. She slowly and quietly slipped out the front door, drawing her white sweater around her, clad in purple silk pajama shorts and a matching long-sleeved top and a white lace headband. Light blue flip flops clashed with the outfit, but she didn't care. The warm night air folded in around her, securing her body from cold.

Making her way to the corner, she saw Eli standing right there, and she could see his house from where they were standing. It would be about a twenty minute walk, but she didn't mind. _If it meant more time with Eli… _

He turned to her, having changed out of his gown and into khaki shorts, a light gray band shirt, and black converse. Offering his hand, he was surprised when she hugged him tightly, squeezing him. "Hey," he choked out, causing her to loosen her grip on him and wrap only her arms around his neck. He rested his arms lazily around her waist, worried if she'd notice the slight lump in his pocket.

Thankfully, Clare did not. She only frantically reached up to kiss his lips, tangling her fingers in his black hair. Feeling his arms tighten around her waist and back her into the streetlight that was overlooking them, Clare gasped and felt her desire only increase. She was speechless as he kissed her in ways he never had before, passion melting on his tongue and lips. His soft lips met with hers over and over again, and she found that her lips fit perfectly between his. "Oh, Eli," Clare moaned, burying her hands into his hair, twisting and slightly pulling, causing Eli to moan against her lips. The chilled metal of the pole stung her back through her shirt, but she didn't mind one bit. She pulled him closer to her so that their bodies were now completely pressed together.

"I love you," He murmured between kisses. Their lips molded together as he brought his hands to her own and entwined their shaking fingers. "Let's go to my yard," he suggested after he leaned out of the kiss.

Clare sighed shakily and almost fell to the ground from the effect the kiss had left on her. Eli smiled and scooped her up into his strong arms, carrying her bridal style for the rest of the journey.

Eventually, the two had made it into Eli's backyard, where a burning fire and a tent were set up. A single log was rolled near the fire, and the tent was stocked with blankets, pillows, and a sleeping bag that could fit the two of them.

"E-Eli," Clare gasped as he gently put her down on the soft grass. "Did you plan this?"

"Yeah," he smirked, bringing her over to the fire. She settled herself onto his lap and leaned her head into the crook of his neck. The heat from the fire radiated into their skin, warming their hearts, along with the adrenaline from this foreign rush of love they were both experiencing. "I wanted to do something special with you." He kissed her forehead and loved the way the fire cast a gentle orange slow on Clare's pale skin.

Clare giggled, still in shock of how perfect this night had been. She felt his warm neck pressed against her cheek and his lips were pressed against her head. Basking in the glow of the fire, the sweet smell of the nearby cherry trees, Clare sighed contentedly. "You know, Eli, sometimes I can't help but feel like I don't deserve all of the wonderful things you do for me."

"You deserve everything, Clare. You deserve the world. I love you so much," he whispered, lightly stroking her back.

Clare smiled at his kindness, and she leaned further into his loose embrace. "Eli?" she asked gently.

"Yes, Clare?" he answered just as gently, not wanting to disturb the peace of the night.

Clare lifted her head off his shoulder and looked directly into his eyes. "You're amazing."

"As are you," he murmured, gazing into her pretty blue's before kissing her lips softly. He pulled away to Clare's disappointment, but her face immediately lit up as he pulled a soft, velvet case out of his pocket.

"W-What is that?" Clare stuttered, not knowing what to expect. _It couldn't be…? _

Eli slowly handed the box to Clare. "I-It's not an e-engagement ring, but it's a promise ring…I just want you to know that, to me, you will always be pure. No matter _what_ has happened in your past, you are pure, beautiful, and amazing to me. You're my angel, and I really mean that."

"Eli, it's so…_pretty," _Clare gasped, slipping the silver ring onto her hand. "I-Is that a…_a real diamond?" _She gestured to the tiny diamond embedded in the sterling silver of the ring.

Eli nodded, leaning his forehead against hers and running his fingers softly over the ring and Clare's entire hand. "It's pretty, like you. Diamonds can't compare to what I feel for you."

Shaking from the amazing, looked-after feeling she was getting, Clare lifted her gaze from the ring, which was sparkling in the moonlight, to Eli's gentle green eyes. She slowly leaned her nose onto his, feeling him begin to lean in as well. Eli gently lifted his hands from her waist and straight to her cheeks, pressing his soft lips to hers softly.

Clare, filled to the brim with passion, slowly kissed him back, wanting to savor the night. Feeling her walls slowly crash to the ground, she finally let go and kissed him with everything in her. She felt Eli stand up and she wrapped her legs around his waist, giggling madly. He giggled with her as they crawled into the tent, kissing fast now with Eli hovering over Clare. She smiled against his lips, bringing her arms fully around his torso, dragging him to her. "I-I need you," she gasped, as his lips slowly kissed down from her cheek to her jaw.

Eli pulled back slowly, earning a whine from a very lovesick Clare. "I-I don't know what you mean."

Clare smiled, bringing him back to her and running a hand through his messy black hair. "I don't mean sex, Eli…but can we take things a bit…further?"

"Oh," Eli sighed relieved, worried Clare was making a mistake. He gently kissed her jaw down to her neck, caring for her skin with his magical lips. She moaned and gasped at the amazing feeling, her arms falling limp at her sides. "As long as the night is about you," he promised into her ear. He slowly unbuttoned her silk pajamas top and slid the material away from her shoulders.

Left in her tank top, Clare moved her hands to the bottom of his T shirt and pulled it off his body, feeling his warm chest press against her stomach. They kissed frantically at this point, absorbed in one another's pure love. "I love you," she exclaimed as his lips kissed up her shoulder to her neck, moving her curls out of the way. "Oh my god," she gasped as he kissed behind her ear.

"I love you," Eli breathed, feeling her hands go to his shoulders. His smooth, warm skin heated her shaking fingertips, calming her.

Clare smiled and pulled his lips back to her own for a moment. "Take it off, Eli," she sighed, moving his hands to her tank top.

"Are you sure?" he murmured against her sternum which he was kissing repeatedly.

Clare arched her back into him. "Yes," she moaned desperately, clawing at his back gently.

Eli groaned and slowly slid off her tank top, leaving her bra-less chest exposed. He gently kissed her chest, stroking her sides slowly, before pressing their chests together.

Clare slowly slid off her own shorts and moved her hands to the button of Eli's shorts.

"Wait, Clare," Eli moaned, his skin heating up quickly.

"Yeah?" Clare sighed, impatient.

"I just want you to know that…this means everything to me. I love you so much, and I won't hurt you."

"I know that, Eli. I know. I've always known," Clare reassured him, before dragging his lips back to hers and flipping him over. "We're not going to have sex, but I want to be with you." She moaned, and immediately, that love was shone.

As they kissed and expressed their love in the tent, the fire blazing on, the stars shone above them. What they did not know, however, was that _"…they were all yellow…" _


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11…

_"Eli,"_ Clare breathed out with a final gasp when she felt what must have been the tenth and final wave of pleasure and love wash over her. Her curls, palms, and legs were slightly sweaty, and a strong essence of heat radiated off her pale skin. Her blue eyes were wide open, her pink lips forming an O shape.

It was around 2AM, Clare noticed, as she glanced over at her watch that was strewn across the tent by the extra blanket across from them. She didn't have much time to think, because as soon as Eli recovered, he slowly pulled her into a gentle, warm embrace. He had turned on his side, bringing her to lie almost on top of him, under the warmth of the sleeping bag and the blankets.

"Hey, Clare," Eli kissed Clare's temple when he saw her shaking. Her shoulders trembled. He slowly adjusted his warm arms so that they wrapped around her entire torso and she hid her face in his neck. "Shh, it's okay, sweetheart." Not knowing what else to do, Eli laid his head on top of hers and stroked her arms lightly.

Clare burrowed deeper into his neck. "I don't want to lose this."

"Lose what?" he asked kindly, kissing her forehead and closing his eyes as he felt her entire body pressed against his. Luckily, her pink lace panties were still on, so she was not fully exposed, as he was still in his boxers.

"This moment," Clare sighed shakily, her nose nuzzling his shoulder. "You,"

Eli raised his eyebrows and pulled back so that her head was no longer hiding in his neck. "I'm not going anywhere, Clare." He said this with finality and gave her a firm look.

She shook her head, her wild curls moving everywhere. "Ever since…my dad died, I've been scared that something's going to happen to you. I know it's not rational, but I'm terrified of losing you…and we just shared something really special. Not _the _special thing, but close to it. I've been worried about my mom and the baby, and you, and just _everything, Eli." _She avoided his gaze until he coaxed her chin up with a single finger so her gaze could meet his. Clare was gently pulled into a hug, feeling her hands lay on his bare shoulders, heat still radiating off the two. She had put her bra back on, but her body was still buzzing. "I'm sorry," she whimpered, not wanting to sound like she was whining for attention.

Eli shook his head with patience. "No," he kissed her shoulder and allowed his head to fall beside hers. "It's alright, Clare." Her shoulders continued to shake as he gently rubbed her back. "I don't mind if you need to cry, Clare. Clare, it's alright. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." His voice was shrouded with love and all the patience in the world, its warmth pushing Clare closer to the edge.

"Eli," Clare cried, a few tears slipping from her eyes. "You make me…_so_ happy." He patted her back rhythmically when she hiccupped over her words. "You _really_ do," She put emphasis on this as he nodded and began running his fingers through her soft curls.

_"It's okay, Clare." _Eli reminded his love. "You make me happy, too. Clare, it's only been a few months. It's going to take some time before you feel better; you know that, sweetie." He felt her nod and a few warm tears sticking to his skin. "Don't you worry, Clare. Everything will play itself out. You don't need to think about everything right now. You just need to have faith in me and, more importantly, in yourself." Eli pressed a kiss to her forehead and continued running his fingers through her wild curls. "Okay?" he asked gently, keeping his voice low and gentle.

Clare smiled up at him, her body bursting with happiness at his generosity and care. "Okay," she whispered, gently kissing his strong shoulder blade before falling into a sweet and deep sleep.

That following Friday… Clare quietly stepped into her house after the long walk home. She had been missing Eli at school. With the seniors gone, Degrassi seemed much emptier now. She and Adam had been hanging out much more frequently, considering he knew how she felt with having Drew gone as well. Drew was going off to Queen's University with Katie, and Adam was going to miss him immensely. Along with that, she had been busy helping her mother around as her stomach was increasingly growing with each passing day. Glen had finally decided to stay home permanently with his pregnant wife as he could see her struggles and wanted to be more helpful and involved.

Not being able to see Eli much had sucked. They had not seen each other since the passion-filled night of his graduation, when he had snuck her back into her house completed with a gentle kiss and a long hug goodbye without Helen's notice the following morning. Eli was busy receiving writing scholarships to various colleges, quite a few of them being prestigious American universities, but he had turned them down, writing back that he had already chosen U of T and that they should offer the scholarships to other young writers who really needed them.

Sighing deeply, Clare smiled faintly at her stepdad, who was gently rubbing Helen's belly and smiling proudly. Even Jake had smiled a bit, feeling things start to come back together for the first time in quite a while. He had graduated and was preparing for the following school year that he was headed for at University of Ottawa. He would be studying contracting and architecture there, moving out of the house to permanently dorm there for his years of schooling. This meant he and Clare wouldn't be seeing each other much, but Jake knew that giving Clare her own personal space and time to find herself again wasn't such a bad idea. In fact, as he still felt very guilty for the selfish way in which he had used and hurt her, all Jake wanted was Clare to be happy once again; he wanted her to be the happy girl she had once been all those years ago when they were only about ten and eleven years old. Back when things were simple, Jake had spent his days simply throwing dead frogs at Clare as a joke and secretly crushing on her all the same. Although they could never see the feelings between their parents that seemed to have always lingered and been present, Clare and Jake had actually once been great friends, and he didn't want to lose that altogether. Distance would do the two good, and Jake Martin knew that. The birth of their baby brother or sister was approaching in a matter of months, and he couldn't believe he was thinking this, and the guys at school would make fun of him eternally for it, but Jake wanted to try to be the best big brother he could be. He had never had a sibling, and he hardly counted his ex-girlfriend as a full-on sister. Smirking, he slowly entered his room and shut the door behind him, finally feeling alright for the first time in a very long time.

Prom was approaching in just over a week, next Saturday. Clare giggled at Eli's not-so-subtle hints about the upcoming dance. For example, he had texted her quite often over the course of the days they had been apart.

ELI: _Hey, beautiful. Know what dance is coming up pretty soon? I forget what it's called. Starts with a P? Any guesses? _

CLARE: _Hmm. Nope. I cannot recall the name of this dance you speak of. _

ELI: _What a shame. I miss you. _

CLARE: _Miss you too. I'll see you soon. 3_

She certainly hoped she did see him soon. School was lonely without Eli by her side, holding her hand nonchalantly as he walked her to class, hugging her gently in the hallway, kissing her secretly, and just being there. There was _nothing _Clare missed more. Feeling this strongly about a boy was not something Clare had ever been used to. She couldn't believe just how much she loved Eli Goldsworthy. All she could think of, as she sat on her bed cross-legged in her pink pajamas that Friday night, was how grateful she was that she had realized she loved him before it was too late. Had she remained the way she was earlier in the school year, desperate to please Jake and pushing her friends and family away from her, Clare would have watched him graduate and walk away from her forever. Had she not _texted him _that very night that Jake had broken her heart, Clare would have had to live her entire life without him. She would have seen him occasionally at college, but that would be the limits of their communication. She would never get to kiss his full and soft pink lips again, feel him gently intertwine his fingers with hers and stroke the back of her pale hand, be in his strong arms, cry on his shoulder as he did everything he could to make her feel better. It would have all been…gone, and she would have lost the boy who cared more about her than _any _other boy had.

Thinking about this sent Clare into a deep thought process. What if she hadn't even met Eli? Where would she be right now? Who would have held her in that hallway on that terrible day of her breakdown over her parents' divorce? Who would have taught her how to drive? Who would have taken her on expensive, well-planned, and romantic dates? Who would have done everything and farther than mentally sane things just to protect her from a past attacker? Who would have gone _so far _to protect her that they put aside their own happiness just for hers? Who else would she have abandoned in a hospital room, only for the guilt to eat away at her? Clare shivered as she recalled arms reaching out for her denim jacket clad arm on a cold night. She remembered his scratched, bruised face, the IVs connected to his hand, and his scared and trembling body hidden beneath a blue hospital gown. The look in his eyes that literally and openly read _please, don't leave me tonight. _Most importantly, who would have restrained and comforted her as she hysterically sobbed the evening of her father's death? Eli had done all of those things; no one else on this Earth would have.

Thoughts like this made her wish that he was sitting on her bed so she could sit on his lap and hold him close, _maybe some kisses here and there, _she thought smiling. Little did Clare know that the moment she laid her head on her fluffy pillow, her dreams would be filled with Eli holding her tight in his arms just as he always did.

The very next day, Eli had picked her up at noon for lunch at the Dot, a trip to the movies to see a film Clare had been dying to watch, and a sweet dinner Eli had prepared for the two of them. The only problem was that he wouldn't tell Clare where they would be eating dinner.

"Come on, Eli! Just tell me!" she begged, giggly stumbling through what felt like grass. Her ankles were lightly brushed by the soft grass as she walked steadily in her blue sundress and sandals to keep up with Eli. It was almost the end of May, and she couldn't believe how warm it was starting to get.

Eli smiled and gently released her hand, only to reach his arms behind her back and under her knees. "We're here, sweetheart." He whispered into her ear, causing a deep blush to creep down to her neck as he slipped off the soft blindfold and set her on her feet.

"Eli," Clare exclaimed, wrapping her arms around his waist. He gently hugged her back, squeezing around her waist and softly rubbing circles on her back. "This is the place where we got back together." She realized this as she saw the very tree where she had cried in his arms the night her heart had been broken, the tree where he had laid her down on the soft grass and kissed all her fears and doubt away. Just in a single evening, this tree, this park, this area, had changed her life.

"Exactly; our new safe haven," Eli said softly as he gestured to a picnic blanket set up with two plates that held Clare's favorite foods. He slowly sat down with her and as they ate, smiles were shared and laughs were created.

Their love only grew and flourished more.

Clare stood up as the cool breeze ruffled her hair, and Eli couldn't help but stare at her beauty. Her curls were shoulder length by now, and they gently flipped and swirled in the light wind. Her pale skin was brought out by the star-speckled black sky, and he couldn't help but admire the light speckling of freckles on her right shoulder. He smiled and stepped closer to her, as she did the exact same. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he brought her close and allowed her arms to wrap themselves around his neck before bending down to kiss her deeply. His lips were gentle with hers, allowing Clare to control the pace and keep it sweet and tender.

She broke apart first, staring up at the crescent moon outlined brightly in the sky. "You know, I've never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. Before you say anything, I need you to hear something that I should've told you _so _long ago." Clare gently traced the outline of his soft lips and pressed her own to them. She could feel Eli's shaky breath as he kissed her back, the kiss innocent as could be. Looking directly into his green eyes while playing with the hair at the back of his neck, Clare's breath hitched.

He met her eyes with equal ferocity and gently rubbed her back. "You don't have to say it, Clare. I know."

"No, you need to know." She swallowed tears as she began to pour her heart out. "I love you, and someday I hope I can fully express that love to you, hopefully on a wedding night. I really love you, Eli. You've been here for me through the ups and downs. I can't recall a time where you left me, even if I deserved it. Like, the time I used you to make my parents angry at me to try and stop their divorce. I _humiliated you _at dinner and I even got jealous of Julia. I never…understood…how you _felt _losing Julia, and having to deal with the guilt that you put on yourself of her death. I understand now, Eli. _I understand how it feels. _My dad is gone, and I know how you felt to lose someone so close to you. I was so _insensitive to you. _I left you in that hospital room all alone, when all I should have done was _hold you, and you know it! _You _know _I should have stayed. I shouldn't have left in that horrible, insensitive way. I don't care that it's been so long either. I don't care that it's been over a year or how different things are now. All I care about is you _not _walking away without knowing that _I love you more than anything in the entire world. _I don't know what I'd do without you." She took a break to draw in a short breath and went on with, "I _never _want you thinking that I didn't appreciate _everything _you've done for me…everything you still _do _for me. I can't believe you've stuck around for so long. I can't believe that you love me so much. More importantly, I see myself spending _the rest of my life with you, Eli." _

Eli's eyes pricked with tears as he softly whispered, "Come here." He hugged her close as she gripped onto him, light tears spilling onto his jacket. "I don't hold anything against you, Clare. I just want us to forget those things. _Please, Clare. Let's just move forward and be happy."_ He saw confirmation as she nodded her head and kept it buried in it shoulder, her tears subsiding. "Prom?" he murmured in a low tone.

"What?" she muttered, pulling back to only be pulled in for a quick kiss as he whispered, "Prom?" once more.

Clare jumped into his arms and hugged him so tight he could hardly breathe. "Yes! Yes, Eli! I want to go to prom with you."

"Good," he smiled as he gently hugged her close and breathed in her flowery perfume. "I love you, Clare. We're going to be fine."

"Forget the past and love the future?" she guessed, holding his hand tightly and pulling him to the ground.

Eli smiled. "Forget the past and love the future." His arms settled around her for about two more hours until he safely returned her home to a smiling Helen and Glen.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12…

"Hey, Dad," Clare addressed the tomb stone inscribed with "In loving memory of Randall Edwards". "Eli and I came to visit you because…well, Prom is tonight, and I know that's where you first met Mom…and you both wanted to ditch your dates and be with each other all night long," she added and laughed, recalling the distant memory of the story her mother and father had shared while sitting her down at age twelve and attempting "the talk" about dating. She slowly ran her freshly manicured nails over the top of the headstone, careful not to damage them. "I miss you," she murmured, "I can't believe how much everything has changed. We've had a lot of good times together, Dad. Remember how _frustrated _I was when you were teaching me how to tell time? Remember how quickly I learned how to tie my shoes and how hilariously amazed you were?" she looked down at the grass for a moment before deciding to sit cross-legged in front of the stone. She gently placed the bouquet of daisies by his grave before continuing. "I think you were the one who was there when I first learned how to walk…mom was at work, and you and Darcy were sitting in the living room with me, trying to teach me how to walk. There's a video of it somewhere…you caught me whenever I fell." Tears stung her eyes as she eyed Eli, who had whole-heartedly agreed to accompany her in visiting her father's grave for the first time since the funeral, standing a few graves away, far away enough for Clare to have her privacy but near enough to respond if she needed him. "Look, I was angry at you for a _long _time, but when I found out you had cancer, I…I just couldn't be." She sniffled and laid her head down on the stone, tracing her father's name with her index finger. "I just want you to know that I will _never _forget you or our good times. I wish you could still be here. I love you," she finished, drained of everything she had wanted to say and kissing the palm of her hand before placing it on the ground.

Eli, noticing her crying, walked over to her slowly. Not wanting to upset her, he sat cross-legged directly behind her and moved so that his arms wound around her waist tightly. He rested his cheek on her slightly trembling back and closed his eyes, hearing the rasping of her lungs. "I love you, Clare." He said truthfully and continued to gently and patiently hold the girl of his dreams.

_Four and a half hours later…_

"OH MY _GOODNESS_, MY BABY IS GOING TO _PROM_!" A _very excited_, proud, and five months pregnant Helen gushed and snapped several pictures of Clare and Eli as they stood by the door, waiting to leave for prom.

"_Mom," _Clare whined as what must have been the tenth picture of her and Eli was taken. She giggled when she felt Eli squeeze her waist and keep his hands there as they posed for the next picture. "Mom, my face _hurts _from _smiling. _I am _not _photogenic!"

Eli scoffed, spinning Clare around to face him. "You will look _beautiful _in the pictures, Clare. You are so gorgeous," he remarked as he took in her baby blue dress that had the beautiful diamond accent in the center. Her outfit was completed with silver heels, the corsage Eli had brought to her and the necklace with the tiny diamond that Helen had given Clare hours before Eli had arrived when Clare was getting ready.

"Thank you, Eli. You look so handsome," Clare giggled, coyly twirling one of her perfectly curled locks around her finger, and all resentment of her mother's obsessive photo-documenting was gone as soon as he gently took her hand into his and intertwined his fingers within hers. "Mom, we have to go now, or we're going to be late!" Clare insisted, practically bursting out the door as Eli smiled apologetically at the very pregnant woman and nodded in sheepish agreement.

Helen frowned, but smiled as Glen came up behind her and wrapped his long arms around her protruding belly and kissed her cheek. "I think you've got enough pictures to fill an entire album, Helen." He joked, resting his chin on her shoulder for a second before slowly approaching Clare and Eli. "Eli, please, keep her safe tonight. Clare, you look so beautiful," Glen smiled thoughtfully and accepted Clare's urgent hug around his waist.

"Thanks, Glen," she blushed and gave her mother a hug as well. When she wandered back over to the door by a grinning Eli, Clare added, "Oh, and don't worry, Glen. I'm in good hands." She clasped Eli's hand in her own and started down the front steps before she was stopped by her mother.

Helen whispered into Clare's ear, "Honey, I want you to have the best time tonight that you can. Have fun, have the most fun you can get while you're still young and you still can. Have a magical time, sweetheart, and please let me know once you're on the road to Banff!" Without another word, Helen hugged her daughter goodbye and watched with her husband as her second youngest giggled and climbed into Eli's car as he held the door open for her. Her heart both fluttered with excitement for her daughter and broke in the recollection that just sixteen years ago, she had first held baby Clare Diana Edwards in her arms at the hospital, with her loving husband Randall by her side. Her mother had been by her side, and Darcy had been sitting on the bed, cross-legged, waiting to hold her baby sister. Tears were brought to her eyes at how touching this all was as she recalled how excited she and Randall were about having another child. Now, Randall was gone, and her baby girl was all grown up, going off to the Prom with the boy she loved. It seemed like just yesterday, young thirteen year old Clare was excited to start school at Degrassi with her older sister by her side. The girl with the long ponytail, school uniform that she chose to wear every day, and the braces and glasses, was now a beautiful young woman with shoulder length, bouncy curls and big blue eyes. She was taller, and Helen finally realized that Clare really had turned out all right.

Glen gently hugged his now crying wife and kissed her forehead emotionally. Guiding her into the house, he quickly made her some herbal tea and put her to bed.

"So, is Jake going to Prom?" Eli asked, gently holding Clare's hand and admiring the corsage out of the corner of his eye. CeCe had picked it out for him, knowing Clare would absolutely love the light green and purple flowers bound together by delicate lace.

"Yeah, with Jenna," Clare said, sighing happily and gazing out the window as they made their way to the hotel. She was not worried about Jake anymore. It wasn't worth it, and if he and Jenna were happy, she had given up on being a monster and not allowing other people to be happy. She had plans on her mind; tonight was the night that inhibitions are damned and second chances were not needed. Her bag lay fully packed in the back seat, and Eli had rented a hotel room just for the two of them, reasoning that they would need a place to crash after the long night. "Are you excited for Banff?" Clare grinned, glancing over to Eli as he continued driving. The city lights of Toronto lit up the skyline, and while Clare loved Toronto, she could hardly wait to get to the mountains.

Eli smiled back at her, keeping his eyes on the road. "I can't wait. I'm mostly psyched to go white water rafting, hiking, and spending time with you though," he gave her a warm look before returning his eyes to the road as they watched the houses disappear behind them before entering the main city.

Clare burst into giggles and her stomach flipped excitedly as he parked the car behind the hotel. "I'm so excited! Tonight will be amazing, Eli." Clare blushed as he came closer to her and pecked her lips.

"Yes, it will," he whispered against her lips before bringing her inside.

Walking inside, Clare gingerly followed Eli as he gently led her to the front desk. The entire time he was checking them in, Clare felt twinges of herds of butterflies just billowing in her stomach, filling her to the brim with happy excitement. She couldn't _wait _to kiss his soft, full lips and run her fingers through his silky dark hair. She wanted tonight to be the night.

"Clare?" he brought her out of her reverie with his soft voice and stroked her hand. "Why don't we go up to our room and get settled, okay? Then we can go down to the ballroom?" he suggested, holding out the slick black Sheraton Centre key card to her.

"O-oh yeah, let's go," she shakily but cheekily accepted the key card and walked to the elevator with him, holding his hand the entire time.

Eli shot her a cute half smile that made her heart flutter and the butterflies return at the thought of kissing those perfect lips once more. As the two entered the elevator, they shared a few anxious and excited yet knowing side glances that only two people seriously in love could share.

Clare couldn't take it anymore. _Oh, to hell with it, _she thought and eagerly brought her arms around his neck to kiss him full on the lips. He gently reciprocated and hugged her to his sleek black suit, feeling her sigh against him and melt into his arms. However, as the doors opened when they finally reached their floor, they were interrupted by a short "_Ahem," _and immediately broke apart.

Imogen Moreno and Fiona Coyne, wearing matching corsages and beautiful dresses, were standing side-by-side, waiting for the elevator to reach their floor. "Well, this is awkward," Imogen giggled as she saw her best friend with cheeks burning red. "Fi and I were just about to head down to the dance floor. Looks like we're on the same floor! Yippee!" she giggled excitedly and twirled her exotic and unique yet beautiful dress. The dress was a gorgeous evening gown, peach colored with a sparkly floral pattern and sequins on the straps. Her dark brunette hair, usually in quirky pigtails or cinnamon buns, was curled perfectly down her shoulders. Her eyelashes were coated with dark mascara and a light lining of gold eyeliner highlighted her chocolate brown, curious eyes.

Eli rolled his eyes at a smirking Fiona before stepping out of the elevator with Clare and allowing the girls to get in. "Sorry," he mouthed to Fiona, who waved her hand to gesture, _it's fine, have a good night. _

"Well, isn't that humiliating?" Clare sighed annoyed as they made their way into the room. She plopped down on the couch and waited for Eli to sit beside her.

He slowly navigated over to her and sat down, placing a caring arm around her shoulder. "Clare, it's okay. You have _no _idea how many times I've walked in on those two making out. Let's just say movie nights have a different meaning at Fiona's loft nowadays," he playfully rolled his eyes and kissed her forehead.

"Eli?" Clare whispered, kissing his shoulder and grabbing his hand to lightly play with his fingers.

"Yeah?" he murmured, leaning his head gently on hers which was resting on his shoulder.

Clare's stomach tightened into a coil of nervous butterflies and her palms began to sweat, causing her to unravel her hand from his. Could she do this? Could she really ask him to make love with her? It wasn't something they had talked about since they day she had tried to seduce him on the beach, and although they had shared a beautiful and loving intimacy on graduation night in the tent, the conversation hadn't been made in quite a while. "Um, never mind, we can talk about it later," she jumped up and grabbed his hand, practically bursting out the door and running as quickly as her heels would allow her to without twisting an ankle.

Eli laughed, finding her rushing rather amusing and adorable. An amused smirk made its way onto his face and she turned around to face him on the way downstairs in the elevator.

"What? Why are you smirking at me like that?" she giggled and stepped closer to him.

"Nothing; you're just adorable," he stated calmly and sighed, straightening his tuxedo in a teasing, overly dignified manner. He widened his green eyes playfully down at her, gazing admirably at the blue-eyed girl. She looked… _perfect. _

Clare stepped even closer until there was no space between them, almost stepping on his shoes. Glancing at the decreasing floor numbers, she realized they had six floors to go until they reached the ground level. "I just might have to wipe that smirk right off your face, Eli." She said softly and placed her lips on his, moaning quietly when she felt his soft and warm lips kiss her back. It was a short, chaste kiss, and she smiled into it, releasing his lips and giggling madly when she felt him wrap his arms around her waist and literally carry her out of the elevator when they reached their destination.

"Oh, Edwards, I am _so _getting payback for that little trick later," he mumbled, causing even more giggles to explode from the overly excited sixteen-year-old.

A few students smiled at the happy couple as they made their way into the main ballroom where everyone was dancing and the music was blaring. "Eli, this is perfect!" Clare exclaimed, pulling him onto the dance floor.

Katie Matlin had definitely done a great job organizing the prom, and violence was not something the students had to worry about this time since Mr. Simpson had made sure to hire extra security and chaperones. No one who _wasn't_ a Degrassi student or a date of a Degrassi student could enter the prom.

By the time Clare had reached her destination in dragging Eli to the center of the dance floor, the song had ended, and she pouted playfully. "Eli, the song's over," she pretended to pout and he saw right through it.

"Clare, if I didn't know any better, I'd say that I sense a smile coming on, sweetheart," he grinned, causing her to immediately drop the pouty puppy-dog act and giggle softly. Just then, the DJ announced that he was going to "slow things down a bit" which automatically caused some of the more awkward couples to shuffle off the dance floor.

Clare slowly turned her face to Eli's, a deep, rosy blush conquering her cheeks. Her blush was only intensified by a returning smirk and Eli's arms wrapped around her waist as she wound her arms around his neck. A few familiar chords of a guitar filled her ears, as she quickly recognized Christina Perri's "_Arms" _beginning to play.

_**"I never thought that you'd be the one to hold my heart, but you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start," **_

_** "You put your arms around me, and I believe that it's easier for you to let me go…you put your arms around me and I'm home." **_

__Clare's cheek found rest on Eli's shoulder as they gently swayed to the music, surrounded by other couples. No words were needed in this perfect moment; she could feel his support in the form of arms twined around her waist, in the form of love holding her racing heart still, and in the form of irrevocability. Eli's love was irrevocable; it would never end. That wasn't something Clare needed to worry about.

_** "How many times will you let me change my mind and turn around? I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown," **_

_** "I hope that you see right through my walls, I hope that you catch me because I'm already falling, I'll never let our love get so close, you put your arms around me and I'm home." **_

__"You know I love you, right?" Eli smiled gently and whispered into her ear, noticing the goose bumps that adorned Clare's delicate shoulder in response.

"Of course, and I love you, too," Clare whispered, letting the beautiful music fill her ears as she felt Eli place a gentle and careful kiss in her cinnamon curls.

He leaned his head against hers slightly, angling her face to his. "I never want to lose you, Clare. You're amazing, and my entire world."

She pressed her lips to his and smiled when she noticed the happy smirk that made its way onto Eli's face. Content, she caressed his cheek and lightly kissed his ear. "You will never lose me, Eli. I'm here to stay."

As the night went on and they slow-danced, and danced to the fast and upbeat songs as well, Eli and Clare grew more and more anxious about spending the night together. It was a happy-anxious feeling, however.

_Two hours later…_

"Oh my gosh, Eli! It's midnight already!" Clare giggled as she noticed the students tiredly making their way up to the upper floors for after parties and some just for mere sleep. She felt his long arms make their way around her waist as she giggled non-stop.

"Yes, it is," he murmured into her ear, pressing a loving kiss to her neck and swimming to the shallow end with her. The hotel's fancy indoor pool was rather empty; the few other guests that had been swimming had filed out by now.

Clare grabbed his hand eagerly and sat on his lap as he climbed into the bubbling hot tub. "This is seriously the best night _ever." _Smiling widely, she lightly played with his fingers and leaned against his smooth chest.

They made small talk, mostly speaking about Eli's up-coming school year at U of T and Clare's senior year at Degrassi. He promised to take her to prom next year, and to be at her graduation, cheering her on. They also spoke about Clare's eagerness to meet her baby brother or sister in a matter of months.

"I don't know what I'd do without you." She whispered into his ear, voice so low that absolutely no one in the world could have heard her except for Eli. She gently trailed her hands down his chest and left a kiss right above his heart. "Eli," she muttered, kissing his cheek and interlocking his hands with both of hers.

He turned to her, grinning. "Yes, sweetheart?"

"I want you. Tonight, Eli," she brought her lips to his and climbed out of the hot tub, pulling him behind her. Looking into the deserted hotel hallway, she noticed no one but a few lingering employees cleaning out the ball room. "Come on!' she giggled, and was immediately swept into his arms as he carried her bridal style to the elevator. They were slightly wet, but mostly dried off.

Once they finally made it into their room after an entire torturous elevator ride full of kisses, Eli turned to Clare, who was slowly peeling off her bathing suit. "Clare, wait," he begged, his glistening eyes fighting not to look at her body. He turned away from her, still clad in his swim trunks.

"What?" she whispered, approaching him and placing her hands on his shoulders before leaving a trail of kisses down his back.

"A-Are you _sure_?" Eli asked shakily, keeping his back and shaking hands to her.

"_Yes, Eli. I love you._" She slowly leaned forward; her back pressed against his, and placed her lips on the outline of his ear. "Make love to me," she whispered softly, kissing his neck for emphasis. "Don't turn away from me, Eli."

He slowly turned around, eyeing her beauty, and gently and carefully kissed her. "I love you, Clare." He promised, knowing she already knew.

"I know. I love you, too." She felt him gently walk her to the bed, and, hanging onto him with all her strength, she was finally taken to a place of love.


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note: I never have author's notes…but this is necessary, I think. Well, this is a very short chapter, but next chapter you guys won't be disappointed. Thanks!**

Chapter 13…

"I love you," Clare murmured, feeling Eli's fingers slide in between her own.

He planted a gentle kiss in her now messy curls, feeling her burning hot skin under his hands. A soft satin sheet covered their exhausted bodies, heat radiating in between the two. Listening to Clare's deep breathing, Eli felt Clare begin to play with his fingers and snuggle into his side with his arm wrapped around her waist tightly. "I love you too, sweetheart,"

Clare giggled and ran her hands over his lips; tracing the outline of the slight bow shape and feeling him tremble slightly underneath her tentative touch. She lifted herself up, balancing her shaky, bare form on her elbows, and gently placed her lips over Eli's.

He gently kissed her back, moving his lips with hers in a slow, non-frenzied pace. After a night of dancing with the girl he loved in his arms, he had finally made love to her, exactly the way she deserved that love to be made…slowly, gently, and most of all, full of importance.

"I love you," she said lowly and smiled because when she pulled back, Eli's hands gently gripped her back and caressed it gently.

Eli's eyes watered slightly as he gazed up into the eyes of the girl whom he loved so much. He'd never seen a truer blue. "…and _I _love _you_, Clare Edwards."

Three months later, in early August, it was around 6:00 when Eli and Clare were sitting in the front room of the Martin cabin with an eight-month pregnant Helen and a very anxious Glen. Gentle sunlight streamed through the windows and illuminated the room.

Helen smiled as Glen stroked the back of her hand, looking over at Eli and Clare. "Are you two happy we decided to come here? I think it's absolutely wonderful." She winked at Clare, who blushed intensely and looked down at her lap and then up at Eli, receiving a wide smile from him.

"I love it, mom," Clare replied in a pleasant voice, feeling Eli's fingers find their way in between hers. "It _is _wonderful,"

Eli nodded in agreement. "Thanks so much for inviting me, Mrs. Martin."

Helen waved her free hand and giggled, "It's no problem, Eli. We're happy you came!" she smiled genuinely and closed her eyes, leaning back against her rocking chair.

Glen stood up after kissing his wife's hand, stating that he was to go find Jake and Jenna. Helen and Glen had decided to allow both Jake and Clare to bring someone, and Jake had chosen Jenna while Clare had chosen Eli. "I'll be right back, Helen," he said softly before quickly shuffling outside in search for his son.

"Well, are you looking forward to U of T, Eli?" Helen asked, taking a sip of her sweet tea and setting it down on the side table. Her hands folded gently across her protruding belly and rubbed affectionate circles.

"Definitely," Eli grinned, holding Clare's hand tighter. "I'm studying English Lit and Creative Writing, and hopefully I'll get to visit Clare often." He felt Clare squeeze his hand tightly.

"I'm very pleased to hear that, Eli. It's been very nice having you with us so often this summer. I know Clare appreciates being able to spend so much time with you before you go to college." Helen giggled and slowly began rocking back and forth.

Clare blushed fiercely, widening her eyes at her mother. "U-Um, yeah, mom, I'll miss him, but…we'll get…through it. We always do," she trailed off and caught Eli's green eyes staring at her lovingly.

Helen sighed, but her breath hitched suddenly and she sat up straight in her chair. Her naturally wide brown eyes practically popped out of her head as she gritted her teeth and bent over slightly.

Eli and Clare exchanged a look before Eli quickly walked across the room to Helen and gently touched her arm. "Are you alright?" Eli asked urgently, grateful when Clare helped him pull the heavily pregnant woman to her feet.

"The baby's coming. Right now!" Helen shrieked, groaning in pain and wobbling over to the back porch. "GLEN! IT'S TIME!" she screamed, seeing Jenna and Jake's eyes widen as they quickly followed Glen into the cabin. Gathering her calm, Helen began to practice the deep breathing exercises she had so carefully done when having Darcy and Clare.

"Okay, sweetheart, we'll be at the hospital soon," Glen reassured his wife, grabbing his car keys. Glancing over at Clare as he was helping his wife out the door, he shouted, "Clare, Eli, meet us at the hospital. Jake, I want you to take everyone with your truck, and we'll meet you there." With that, the eager man quickly assisted his rather frantic wife.

Clare looked down at her lap, hands folded and shoulders slightly shaking. "Eli," she whispered, feeling Jake and Jenna's eyes on her.

He was there in a second, kneeling in front of her chair and wrapping her in a tight hug. "Clare," he murmured, stroking her curls lightly as she cried softly. "Your mom is going to be just fine. You're going to meet your little sister or brother soon." He gently rocked her and peered over Clare's quivering shoulder at Jake's widened eyes, reading his face as a probable beg to hurry up. Eli gently kissed Clare's shoulder and pulled back, pleading with his eyes for her to look at him closely. "Let's go meet your mom at the hospital, okay, Clare?" he smiled as he saw Clare sniffle and smile widely, eagerly shaking her head yes.

"Alright, let's move it, people!" Jenna called urgently, practically jumping out the door with a much frazzled Jake following suit.

**Five Hours Later… **

"Here, Clare, I thought you might like this," Eli smiled; handing Clare a Starbucks mocha latte with extra whipped cream and gently wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Startled, Clare averted her striking blue eyes from her iPhone and smiled softly at Eli, pulling him in for a gentle kiss. She smiled against his lips as she felt him smirk against hers when he placed the coffee cup on the floor and pulled her into his lap. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him chastely, loving the way his hand gently rubbed up and down along her back. Once they pulled apart, blushing when they realized Jake and Jenna were only about ten feet away purchasing snacks at the vending machine, Clare curled up in Eli's lap. Her head rested on his chest and he supported her body with his strong arms and laid his head atop hers. "Thank you for being here with me, Eli." she stated softly, grinning as he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead and folded his fingers in between hers.

"Clare, there's nowhere I'd rather be." His heart stuttered when he saw her breathtaking smile overtake her face once again and couldn't help but place a series of gentle kisses in her curls. "Why don't you get some sleep? It's almost midnight."

She smiled and readjusted herself in his embrace, leaning her petite body against his and sipping her latte happily. Despite the caffeine, exhaustion got the best of her, and Clare fell asleep right in Eli's arms as soon as the latte was empty.

"Kids," Glen stood in front of them, motioning Jake and Jenna to come over. "Who wants to meet the baby?" he was grateful when Eli gently shook Clare awake, and the slightly tired-out girl followed everyone down the hall to meet the newest member of the family.

Inside the room, Helen was sitting against the pillows as everyone entered.

Clare's eyes widened when she saw the tiny bundle of pink blankets that Helen was holding. "Does that mean…"

"It's a girl," Her mother answered nodding, finishing her sentence for her. "Meet your baby sister," she slowly held out the baby to Clare, who took her into her own arms and gently rocked her.

"Hi, baby. I'm your big sister. My name is Clare," she kissed the newborn's forehead and held her close, cooing nonsense to her and smiling hugely.

Eli's eyes twinkled as he watched the heartwarming sight from the other side of the room. Glancing around him, he noticed Jenna leaning into Jake's side and placing a hand over her heart. Jake ran a gentle hand through Jenna's blonde hair and kissed her forehead before walking over to his stepmom.

Everyone took turns holding the baby, even a blushing and bubbly Jenna, who respectfully returned the young baby back into her mother's arms.

"Eli? Would you like to hold her?" Helen asked gently.

Startled, Eli approached the bed and felt Clare gently rub his back from behind him. "A-are you sure, Mrs. Martin?" He certainly did not want to hurt the baby. After all, she would be just like a little sister to him once he married Clare.

"Of course, Eli. Who knows? She may end up being your sister-in-law someday!" Helen eyed a blushing Clare and giggled quietly when she saw her daughter mouth an indignant response to her blunt statement.

Eli's eyes glistened with tears as Helen handed him the newborn baby. "What's her name?" he asked quietly as he gently cradled the girl in his arms and glanced down lovingly at her.

"Glen and I were thinking…Paige. Paige Camille Martin," Helen responded, kissing Glen's lips briefly and smiling as Jenna accepted her silent invitation to take a seat at the edge of her bed.

"Paige is a beautiful name." he grinned down at the squirming baby. "She's…she's one month premature. Will she be alright?" he asked in slight alarm. He just couldn't live with himself if Clare lost somebody else in her life.

"Oh, Eli, of course she'll be alright. The doctors say she might have a little trouble gaining weight, but that's the only issue she should have. She's tiny, you know. Only four and a half pounds," Helen beamed at her youngest daughter who gently grasped Eli's hand with her little finger.

Clare giggled furiously at the look of dazzle on Eli's face. _He's in love with her already, _she thought to herself and playfully rolled her blue eyes.

Jake brought Jenna close to his side, wrapping an arm around her waist and kissing her cheek lightly.

_Miracles do happen, _was the thought that spread through everyone's minds as Eli gently placed Paige back into her mommy's arms.


End file.
